If a girl was very beautiful and had high-functioning autism, would you be willing to date her? I have Asperger's Syndrome (a high-functioning form of autism) and I am quite attractive (not bragging, it's relevant to the question). I have a pretty good personality. Would you date someone like me?
no, i would not. I have enough social anxiety issues of my own that i struggle to manage. I do not need to add the complication and stress to my life of someone even more awkward than I am. especially when it is someone who does not even try to get better at social interaction, because they just point to their autism as a "get out of jail free, i don't need to try because i'm mentally ill and that excuses everything" card. besides, only about 10% of those who say they have asperger's actually have a diagnosis to back it up. the rest self diagnose and use it as an excuse for their complete inability to act like a normal person, because that is easier than actually trying to figure out the same things the rest of us have to figure out.
does this mean you're faking? no. you could legitimately have autism. but with so many people out there desperate to find some label to assign themselves so that they can proudly declare "I'M NOT NORMAL!!!" I think you should be able to understand why I take the claim with not just a grain, but a heaping pile, of salt.
Yes mainly because I understand what it is and what challenges you have to overcome. I would be supportive, empathetic and honest and encouraging. I will however have to set boundaries as sometimes with Asperger's you would get frustrated by not having your needs met or being able to fully articulate what you want. I have a couple of friends with this and they are still really cool people. One thing to remember is that with this developmental stage having been missed is that often these people are extremely smart and or gifted. With support and behavioral training these people can and do find love.
For many boys, esp your age when many are just mean and act like assholes, it would be very hard to find one. That is why the geeks and nerds are the best. They would understand what your issues are and they would treat you best. I don't know what qualifies as a geek and nerd nowadays though. In my time, it was anyone that liked computers and tried hard at school. The TV show parenthood really showed people what Asperger's is. At least one form. So I think more people know about it then used to. Personally, I would date someone that had it.
I personally would have been diagnosed with ASD 4-5 years ago however I can honestly say I wouldn't anymore. I went from not being able to look people in the eye to making sales and negotiating deals. I really changed through high school and my career.
I know this might sound crazy but I actually don't believe in high functioning autism. I never accepted that I might have it and therefore I was able to accept the problems I had without having a disability to "excuse" my behavior. Eye contact was something that can be fixed and now comes natural. I realized talking constantly about special interests drives people away and I focused my energy instead on learning about people through practice. I went from having 0 friends freshman year and being the victim of constant harassment to having a great friend group (full of normal people) my senior year as well as becoming class president.
Honestly, don't think of autism as part of your identity because it in itself is a disability that will continue to affect every part of your life. Think of it as social/personality issues you have that need to be worked on. Once you fix whatever minor issues you have people will be drawn to you and you won't have to identify with autism ever again.
ASD is NOT lifelong so don't let it tell you how to live your life.
In your case, how does the Asperger's manifest itself? I'm curious how you came about realizing this and how you gained insight. When I was your age no one talked about this. I did know a guy when I was a teenager who would definitely be considered to have Asperger's in today's world. He's doing well.