I feel like I can't get white guys?

I'm biracial (black and white ) . I'm light skin with super curly hair. I have only dated 1 white guy , the rest were black. I want to date a white guy but I always feel like I'm " not good enough " . I feel like they want white girls , straight hair , etc. It makes me feel bad about myself. I feel like I'll never get one and if I do they'll always think I'm " not attractive " or something. I'm completely confident with black guys , and they always give me attention. Once a white guy complimented my hair and flirted with me and I literally was SO awkward. I didn't know how to even act or what to say. I just get so nervous and I have such low self esteem. Help !


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I believe that most men who are straight don't care what a woman's skin tone is and neither should you. Be proud of who you are as a woman, never think of yourself as unattractive. Be confident in your appearance. If you could get the attention of those men that you dated, surely you have gained the attention of over men. Some guys are not readily going to approach a beautiful woman. If you really like someone, just approach him. You are good enough, everyone is good enough, don't sell yourself short.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Don't feel awkward or weird. I'm biracial. I'm black and white hispanic #latina, but I date a lot of white guys. My boyfriend is white. He's white asf and a total hipster, which, if we're honest here, is a white thing, lol. Not in a bad way, haha. I take more after my Black side while my sister is more Latina looking. My boyfriend saw me with my natural hair, which is an afro, before we started dating and he still asked me out. He loves my natural hair too.

    I always felt like I wasn't good enough or something, but I am better than good enough. Just be yourself. They are the same as black guys except they are a different skin color. No biggie. You have no reason to have low-self esteem. I actually found that white guys were more attracted to me than any other races. Not all of them want a white girl or are only willing to date white girls. Don't put yourself down!

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What Guys Said 24

  • It's all in your head, there's really nothing wrong with you and white guys are just that guys, they're no different than black guys in real life except you are putting white guys on a pedestal. I think from what you're telling me that you are worth dating, you probably have that island look to you, with brown curly hair that's a bit bushy and way cute, I think if you have freckles that would be icing on the cake. :) I would compliment you too.

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  • Every single ethnicity statistically prefers to date among their own ethnicity. You are most likely living in a majorly white country which enhances this effect (because whites can choose among themselves while minorities have less selection). Add to that that mixed black-white people usually look more black and you know why its easier for you to get together with blacks than whites.

    That being said there definitely are plenty out there who would date you after getting to know you. The attraction and ethnicity is just a first-impression thing.

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  • A woman is a woman regardless of rac, e colour or religion. You've just got to be patient and a guy will see the woman and nothing else.
    Some guys even find what your describing exotic.
    Good luck

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  • You are a little old to be going through these teenage self doubts.

    Date who you makes you laugh. It doesn't matter if there is a racial bias, it is your preference, no one else's.

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  • Believe me, there are PLENTY of white guys who'd be fine with you. More than race, be your gender... Be female - be a confident woman and exhibit womanliness and femininity. No straight man can turn away from that unless you are hideously ugly.

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  • Stop putting white guys on a pedestal and look at them like you would any other race, it's all in your head.

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  • I think it's all in your head. You are being the greatest obstacle between yourself and dating white guys...

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  • White guys don't just want white girls. I can vouch because I am one, 100%. I'd actually argue A LOT of white guys look to other races because of how unpleasant white girls often can be. I was reading some stats recently that white guys are most interested in Asian girls, and also to a lesser degree other races especially Hispanic girls. I'd assume it's because of the culture but it could be a fetish I guess.

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  • I feel like this should be the go to for all non-white women when it comes to White guys
    @RationalMale once again your take was awesome
    www.girlsaskguys.com/.../a9186-black-women-you-want-to-date-a-white-guy-here-s-how-to-up-your-odds

    You ever go for Asian guys?

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  • I know this gorgeous girl from my old church and she fits your description. Mixed, light skin, button nose and curly hair. I would love to date her, but she never bothered showing any interest. Plus I think she was with her family in that "worlds strictest parents" TV show. Lol!

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  • Perhaps it's this pervasive feeling that you aren't attractive to them which they find off putting.

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  • Just ignore race. As a weird mixed race person myself I just don't make it a real factor. Seems so superficial.

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  • Don't take it personal. Okcupid has found that white guys are the most race loyal group, dating wise, in the USA.

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  • What makes you so sure that you can't get white guys? You're female, right? That's usually all that matters.

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    • I'm white, by the way. A black girl walked past me just the other day. We smiled at each other. I would have considered stopping to talk to her but I was on my way to work.

  • if you want mass appeal. straighten your hair.

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  • We just tend to prefer our own kind, it doesn't mean you're unattractive or "not good enough". What's wrong with dating other black men or biracial men, or any other race of man? I'll never understand the obsession of non-white people wanting to date white people.

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    • Why does it just have to be black men? I am half white so why focus so much on the black side? I was raised with an all white family , and knew no one black in my family. I have a very deep southern accent as well , and have lived in the south all my life. I click and relate better to white men

    • You said you dated a lot of black men, but I did also mention biracial and any other race. There are white men who don't care about race, I guess you just have to find them.

  • I'm white, blue eyed, shake hands with my father, cringe when people don't know which buttons to leave unbuttoned on a suit jacket, etc. That white.

    Do not care about a girl's skin tone, at all.
    I like different types of hair, as long as the hair is dark.

    Don't underestimate yourself so much.

    You're allowed to be awkward - guys find that cute. As long as you awkwardly let them know you're interested.

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  • There are probably some men who just won't be interested in you because of your ethnic background. To hell with them! That being said, what difference does a man's ethnicity make to *you*?

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  • keep trying, you'll find someone :)

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  • There will always be at least one person somewhere in your life with your specifications :)

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  • Find someone who shares similar interests and relax you are a wondrous creation and you deserve the best. period

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  • Of course you can't get a god you mortal.

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  • i find some light skin people hotter than white chicks

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  • Obviously the problem is you, not the guys.
    There's really no way for us to fix that for you, just get over it or shut up.

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What Girls Said 9

  • Lmao, sorry to laugh at you but seriously woman. Get a grip, get some self confidence and a backbone. Stop thinking of white men as some supreme men on the dating scale. I am full on black, and I get asked out by white, black, Asian. Why? Because I have confidence and when I speak to a man that isn't of my race I don't behave as if they are better than me. Grow up

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  • Get with a guy who you love and who loves you!
    You shouldn't date someone you dont feel equal to.
    I do get the whole " he'd prefer a white girl"
    If that's the case, then you guys shouldn't be together.
    Find confidence in yourself and find someone who vales and appreciates you, a guy who NEVER leaves you second guessing yourself or the relationship.

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  • Stop thinking about his color and just get to know them as a person. You're focusing too much on him being "white" that you can't function properly. Just talk to them regularly like you would with a black guy.

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  • stop feeling inferior to white men or any men!!! Learn to value yourself and any guy would be very lucky to have you.

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  • Unfortunately most white guys dont like black women, whether they are lightskin or darkskin. That's just the way the world is. I love Hispanic men and I have the same problem you have so I know how you feel but there's nothing we can do about it. :(

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  • I'm sure there are plenty of guys of an race who would love to date you. Just concentrate on being more relaxed around white guy--they're just like other guys. And let them know you're interested! If you are, they probably are too!

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  • Just pick them and drag them lol!

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  • I think they like 'black' girls with white features including straight hair.

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  • Honestly, I'm white and I have a hard time getting white guys to like me too!

    Don't feel bad, it has nothing to do with you. There's nothing wrong with you.

    I think you just need to find the right person. I feel that way sometimes too, I feel like guys only want some really small, thin brunette who has green eyes and perfect skin. People find all sorts of different things attractive.

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