Guys, I am so confused... Shyness or lack of interest?

I asked out this shy guy a couple weeks ago and we had an amazing date that lasted half the day. Asked him out again a week later and had yet another amazing date that lasted even longer. I made it really clear to him that I'd really enjoyed myself and told him to call me up so we could go out again. I haven't gotten a call or a text since then. I saw him several days ago at a social function and he was extremely sweet to me the whole day, took care of me, bought me lunch, paid total attention to me, and asked about my work schedule. He also seemed to be more comfortable with me and it was great. Still no calls or texts. I'm really, really confused. Is this guy not interested? I am not the type of gal that chases men who aren't interested in her but I am a bit confused as to how someone acts so crazy about me but doesn't call or text... I like this one and it took him WEEKS to even ask for my # so I'm trying to be careful. Thanks for the help


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What Guys Said 3

  • It doesn't seem like he's doing this just to be polite. I expect he's interested. I can't say why he's not making any efforts to contact you. While it might be shyness, it seems like something else. Like, he can't seem to believe you like him, for example.

    My thought is to contact him and set up another date. When the time seems right ask him if he likes you. My guess is that he would be surprised by the question and quick to answer yes. Then the next point is to say that you really can't be sure since he never contacts you. Hopefully he will volunteer an explanation and get better at this. This approach is better than asking him why he doesn't call you which puts him on the defensive. It might also shake him up enough to get him thinking about what's happening.

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    • I have to wonder if there is something going on in his personal life because I think he is interested too. I'm not going to ask him why he doesn't call me. Instead, I will tell him when I hear from him next that I've missed talking to him. I think that will have better results =)

    • I agree. That's a much more positive way to approach this.

  • Shyness, I don't think he'd have accepted your invitation and acted the way he did if he was uninterested.

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    • You know what else is weird too... when I saw him last, it felt like he was almost "manning up"... in the past, he'd have been too nervous to express opinions. Now he's comfortable doing it and he even turned me down when I tried to buy him coffee. I am so confused

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    • Well, so I suggest you to think how long you wanna wait. Just don't wait until the wait becomes loss of time. If after everything you said he does nothing, then it's really hard to belive that this is going somewhere.

    • I agree. I think it's time to just move along

  • Nothing wrong with asking him wtf?

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