Im 23 and i will be 24 in two months, i feel like i wasted my whole year to people who wasted my time who where extremely pessimistic and negative beings, toxic people because of them i fell into a depression and i wasted my 23rd year which was supposed to be fun. I fell into a depression and it was the darkest period of my life, they guy i liked rejected me and i just wasted this year by not doing much, just school thats it and i dont even like my degree, i feel im getting old and i am losing hope slowly, by nature i am very extroverted open and i m not afraid to take on challenges, new hobbies, the people around me are very negative , very 'stable' same boring group of friends and make barely any changes in their life... like they are afraid to dream. How can i forgive myself and live my life and gain hope? i regret i wasted this year by doing nothing much, i really regret it, im not getting any younger...
I feel you answered your own question. Pursuing your dream goal while in school is best feeling. Also pursuing hobbies is not bad but meet up in clubs, or ground that's doing the same thing and keep it pushing. Ghetto style is if ain't talkn money or career then ya ain't doin nothing. I hate it but I kind of get what they mean. Your here on earth to learn and grow. To go forth to peace and joy and if anyone disturbs those two things ( peace and joy) then I am to cut them off no matter how hard it seem.
Quarter life crisis.. we all go through it. You'll be great, and you realizing this is going to help turn it around. Get rid of those toxic people in your life, or at least limit your exposure to them, and focus on yourself and doing things you enjoy that bring you happiness.
Also, your worth is not dependent on a guy. You'll find someone who loves you the same way you love them and your relationship will be fantastic. That guy just wasn't the right one.
As for school, that's not a bad thing to focus on when you have a hard time.. do well, do what you're supposed to do for yourself and everything else will eventually fall into place. If you don't like your degree, change it, or maybe pick up a second one in something you DO like. But also remember that most people don't even end up in the same field they studied anyways.
Don't think so much about age and time, focus on the now and finding what will make you not dread getting older. I honestly would suggest taking a trip. Reach out to friends who you're not as close to, you might find that they're still there for you and that they'll welcome you with open arms.
It sounds like you are surrounded by academic sorts and need more jocks/athletic types building endorphins. The first & easily correction is to join dance lessons. At first you'll wonder why this would work due to criticism of your not knowing what the hell you're doing which will soon turn to having fun then catching on then endorphins from the physical training then finding progress and yearning for more to social doors opening that were invisible to you prior to being surrounded by the most enthusiastic sorts, all like family to looking into the future to find teens-70+yo participants, a life long "hobby" that will include romance someday... besides sex, nothing more romantic than dancing with your SO/spouse
Own it and stop bitching about it. They didn't make you fall into depression. Start moving forward and think of the lesson you learned as having a cost of one year of your life... respect the lesson and don't repeat it. What do you really want? Figure it out and make that your everyday goal, move towards it everyday.
That's how I feel now. I thinks it's just finding out who you are. You didn't waste your life, you learned what you won't tolerate from people now. I'm sure when you meet people like that you will take the apporiate action to steer clear from them. So you learned something. You aren't even that old, just try new things everyday. What are somethings you always wanted to do? Life is only wasted when you are dead. As long as you are alive you have the choice to live an okay life or to live an exciting one. take risks because you are young, people who are unhappy are ok with t comfort and that stability in life. It's the one who takes risks and have new experiences that have the most exciting and rewarding lives. They don't let fear stop them. Forgive yourself? You don't need too learn from the experiences you had with people. And create new experiences. You learn from bad and good experiences. Just live in the moment.
I understand how you feel.
I would suggest maybe meeting with a counsellor. Aside from a lot of your other concerns, you could discuss goal setting with him/her.
I met with a counsellor a long time ago and while I was wary of her to an extent as she seemed a little biased (that's something you have to be careful of, who you choose as a counsellor), she pointed out something to me that I never realized about myself: that if I have not done something at a particular age, I am so obsessed with that fact that I cannot pursue that thing later on.
And that can be said about anything in my life not just education. This is essentially what causes me to postpone things so much.
Also, get rid of friends who are toxic and focus a lot on your hobbies/travel/meet new people etc.