Aside from the drugs, he seems like a nice guy and he's in college and she promises not to go down the same path as him
- Allow19% (7)25% (9)22% (16)Vote
- Not allow81% (29)75% (27)78% (56)Vote
Most Helpful Guy
Honestly, I wouldn't put too much stock in what she says. Many girls, and indeed many people in general, say "I won't do this", but then they end up doing it for whatever reason. I know this because... well, I didn't actually do what I said I wouldn't do, but I got to a point that I would have been willing to if it came down to it.
Think about a time or TIMES in your own life when you were that person. Or maybe your husband. Or anyone that you know. I would then say to her "look, I understand that you're excited about being in a relationship. I also understand that you want to honor the values that I raised you with. But when you're in the position that you are now, it's easy to say that nothing will change." Notice that I didn't say anything about her youth. Don't comment on her youth. That will tell her that you think that because she's young that she's automatically incapable of making good decisions. Yes, she is young and wild at heart, but I still wouldn't recommend addressing her youth directly.
I would ask her what she finds attractive about him. You want to show that you are genuinely interested in her life (as you should be). Then you want to ask her WHY that's attractive. This is so that you can catch the red flags when you see them (know what they are, please) and you can share about your own experiences from when you were younger and first learning about men and what they're like.
Basically, I wouldn't recommend outright banning her from seeing this guy. At least not right now. You want to say things that will make her think more deeply about the situation. As @JuicyBrain said, an outright ban would likely make her want him more.0
Most Helpful Girl
I think that for now, it's best to allow the relationship but to keep a close eye on it. So like having them spend time together where you can be around in the background. He's probably a good dude, but she's very young. That's all that concerns me in this instance. I feel like not allowing her to see this guy will just make her go behind your back, which could put her in danger. Best to have everything out in the open where you can see what's going on than to have her sneak around.0