Guy doesn't commit 4 months into dating so I left him.. did I make the right decision?

So i met this guy through online dating... As I got to know him, he told me that he wanted to take things slow because he gets too emotionally absorbed in a relationship which only leads him to getting hurt.. so it took us a really long time to even hold hands or kiss.. After dating him for only 2 months I realized that I was beginning to fall really hard for this guy but I became unsure about how he felt cause he was always being so cautious.. I had a talk with him on where he sees this relationship going because we did meet through online dating so I was a bit skeptical.. He told me that he likes me and he's attracted to me but he feels like we lack common interest and values.. He told me he usually dates people that he has common interest with but because we met through online dating I'm very different.. I realized that he started weighing the pros and cons about me and he's kind of over analyzing everything cause he doesn't want to jump into a relationship if it might not work out. i realized that he was setting up walls just so he doesn't get hurt and it left me more confused as to where this relationship was headed. After that talk, we decided to get to know each other better and our relationship kind of improved because he invested more time to meet me and he's been more affectionate.. We even ended up having sex and i feel a lot closer to him.. Its been 4 months now so i brought up the topic of what we are because i thought its more than enough to get to know someone within that time frame.. when i brought up the topic he told me he felt unsure because he felt like we lacked connection and i don't really understand his sense of humor.. but then he told me he likes me and he tried to hug me.. i started crying and at that moment i decided to just leave him so i ended up just walking out on him..

did i make the right decision?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Of course you made the right decision. Who needs that kind of aggravation? Good relationships aren't that much pain.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Yes, I think you made the right decision.

    The right guy is the one who isn't indecisive about wanting to be with you. He seems to have doubts, and was honest about that fact. So at least he let you know where you stand with him.

    You both seem to want different things out of the relationship. You want comittment, it seems he isn't ready for that. So ending it means you can now look for a guy who doesn't have doubts about being with you, and wants to be in a committed relationship... like you do.

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What Guys Said 0

The only opinion from guys was selected the Most Helpful Opinion!

What Girls Said 5

  • Yes, I've come to the realisation over the years that if you don't know where you stand with someone within 6 weeks/2 months tops then its likely they are not looking for a relationship and just out to mess you about. I think girls often make the mistake of sleeping with someone thinking it will seal the deal as it were, but that never works. You did the right thing walking away, chalk it up to shit happens and learn from it :)

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  • You should've done this long ago.

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  • No you made quite possibly the deepest mustake you'll ever make.😔

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  • Oy vey, he needs to sort his shit out. Yeah, I think you made the right decision.

    He has to learn not to let his past baggage and negative experiences interfere in current relationships with completely different people. He probably lost out on a great girl here because he's over-analyzing and scared to move forward. That sucks, but you can't just focus on his issues and needs, and walk on egg shells - your wants and desires matter too. It's too bad he didn't seem to get that.

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