Good friend of the opposite sex?

When you have a girlfriend/boyfriend and you have a good friend or best friend of the opposite sex what is an appropriate and respectful way to keep this friendship whilst still having a partner and not having them feel uncomfortable?

Also if you have had on and off feelings for such good friend and kissed one time, is this still appropriate?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • In my experience, there are two occasions where a guy will have a girl as a "BEST FRIEND." 1... The guy is simply biding his time in the hope that he will soon see her NAKED. 2... The "Guy" is a homosexual, and/or her own brother. The latter part of your question..."kissed one time, is this still appropriate?" Let's simply accept the fact that this answer should be obvious to anyone. Most "Attractive" guys are not interested in having a female as a friend. We are simply interested in "HAVING" the girl. My response is of course meant for those who seek the truth.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm very lucky to have a boyfriend who doesn't care in the slightest. We both have close friends of the opposite sex, so we know it isn't any cause for concern.

    If there were feelings for the friend at one point, that'd be a little more iffy, but if you trust your partner then it still shouldn't be a huge issue. I have the firm belief that being possessive (or otherwise weird) over who your partner interacts with will do nothing but harm the relationship. If your partner is devoted to you, the presence of temptation won't affect them.

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What Guys Said 10

  • you have to be really careful with boundaries around these relationships to protect your boyfriend. Don't share intimate details with the old friend about your relationship. If you do something with the old boyfriend, the new boyfriend must be there. that may end up being bad and then you have to end the relationship with the old boyfriend if doesn't go well.

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  • Unless the female friend is completely unattractive or the girl I'm dating is significantly better looking I dont think I could have a close female friend while I am in a relationship.

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  • i had no problem, if she had a "friend" but if there was intimacy before, this would make me uncomfortable.

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  • I like to meet the guy

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  • You should probably be asking your Significant Other which behavior is okay and which is not. If it is okay, you should mention you have a boyfriend/girlfriend. I don't know if it is appropriate or not, but maybe you should avoid it if your feelings are on and off. Wouldn't want to hurt your current boyfriend/girlfriend, would you? You should probably talk to boyfriend/girlfriend about what is going on or appropriate. My two cents anyway.

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  • There is no respectful way to keep both the male friends in your life and the boyfriend. In my opinion and you're free to disagree, but I don't think its fair on the boyfriend. Even if you ignore that for most of the male friend, the one you had feelings for he has to go

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  • They should also become best friends with your friend. in my opinion this makes the relationship better. Like a group of friends i. e. "friends" and "himym." if your gf/bf hates your friemd you should break up.

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  • I personally don't think so. Especially if your lover is bothered. But to each their own.

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  • I've never found it easy to have a good friend of the opposite sex while in a relationship. I currently have a female friend I recently got close to outside of my relationship and I do have feelings for her. I don't think it's appropriate to have kissed them one time, but I know if that happened between me and my friend, I probably wouldn't regret it only because it would tell me how strong my feelings are for her.

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  • lol stories like this make me feel healthy. "friendship" with women always sounded silly to me.

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What Girls Said 9

  • Yeah i do. haha he my cousin but I wouldn't ever date him and I told him and we both agree. I am way older than him and he too young. I am 20 n he 15. haha Sweet funny kid but not a chance in hell. Although I love and care for him but more in a friendly brother sort of way. A guy my age trying to be my friend it sound possible but I don't know. I kinda of avoid guys simply because they waste my time.

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  • My boyfriend has so many friends of the opposite sex. It panicked me at the start but then I realised I need to not be so insecure and trust him.

    Be honest with your partner and tell them there's no need for them to feel uncomfortable. And if your partner is ever feeling insecure, make sure you're open to hearing him out and reassuring him every once in a while (if you need to).

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  • The best way I have found is to hang out with both of them at the same time. That way there is nothing going on behind the scenes.

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  • I kiss my best friend and I find no problem with it, I love her! And I'm straight*

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  • Yes it's still appropriate. You should introduce them and maybe they can become friends, too! :)

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  • I would say it's okay to keep the friendship, but cut back on it a bit. For example, no more hanging out alone, texting in the middle of the night, etc.. It's just disrespectful to the person in the relationship.

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  • if he has a friend of opposite sex I would not be ok with him going see her without me and I would not like if they touch each other (hugs and all).

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  • Bros before hoes, of course you should keep seeing your friends regardless of their gender. A relationship should not cost you your social life.

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  • My guy friend has a girlfriend and I never has feelings for him so it works out

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