Did he friendzoned me? Was I right to walk away?

We met on dating site and went on 3 dates. Nothing physical happened so I asked him to be honest with me. And this is what he said:

"Look the truth is that the day after we met my ex reappeared and fucked with my brain again. I think you’re really cute and probably the coolest person I met in (insert country). But I don’t want to be the douche that plays safe and if things end up happening leaves. Specially after you told me it was hard for you the last time.
That said, I’d like to keep hanging out if that’s ok :)."

I said I'm not okay with that because I wasn't looking for a friend and that he knows where to find me if he changes his mind. Did I gave up too soon?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Why are you coming to seek justifications here? This is just too much drama for me. *Sigh* This is saddening. So many women complain their men are not their friends or close enough, but you do not want that. It is okay for you not to want a friend, but he probably does want someone who is special to him. If he cares and likes you, he will take you back. As for whether such a relationship would work, who knows? What am I saying? You would not let him to take back an ex and now you want to be taken back as an ex? Maybe you'll be nicer now knowing why he does what he does?

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    • How could I be an ex when we didn't even kissed? He is free to do what he wants, if he wants to be single then that's his choice. But it's my choice then too to not want to be around someone who I am sexually and romantically attracted to, it's too hard. I am sad that he didn't even want to try. He didn't said he likes me, just that I'm cute and cool. It's not much to hold on to, isn't it? I'm all cool with taking it slow, but I need to have some feedback at least. I've heard so many bullshit stories over the years that I just can't handle anymore. If he was into me he should've made that clear and I would probably stay.

    • I am not sure what kind of feedback you want me to give you. Maybe he is not into you if that is the message you got. I am probably not the kind of person you want to be talking to about this.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Wow he was a super nice and honest guy. Your response was pretty immature and you should've been more understanding.

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    • I wasn't immature about it, I responded nicely. I told him I understand and that I'm not holding it against him, but that he should've been more forward from the start. I used smiley emoticons as well. I am really not pissed at all, just sad because I liked him. I said I don't want to be just friends because well yeah I don't, it's too hard for me.

What Guys Said 2

  • I think he was only being honest with you but you also did the right thing.

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  • No I don't think so. Hopefully you didn't say it so harshly because I think he said in a very gentlemanly manner.
    He's unsure what the near future holds and he doesn't want you to wait for him as he is waiting to see what happens. It is your choice if you want to wait for him, but just remember, he may not go back to you in the end.

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    • I'm not waiting for him to come back, I'm pretty sure he won't. I was very nice to him as well. I thought a lot about it, honestly. But I don't think I ended up being bitch just because I refused to hang out, I did what I felt was right, for my own sake. Because it would be too hard for me to just hang out with him cuz I fell for him hard. :( I hope he is not mad at me...

    • Don't worry, let your mind be at ease. He is definitely not mad at you, on the contrary, the reason he told you was because he didn't want you to get hurt in the future or be stuck in a stagnant relationship.

What Girls Said 0

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