Peer pressure/ why am I single?

Hey, so I'm 16 and I've never had a boyfriend, never had alcohol (I've tried it but I didn't like it that much) and I don't smoke, which in my eyes is totally normal.

however it is 2016 and all of my friends and people in my year have all been in a relationship, have parties with alcohol and smoke. Once again this doesn't bother me.

But I do occasionally feel as though I'm missing out, all my friends keep telling me I need to get a boyfriend and that I'm "so pretty" how have I not had a boyfriend etc etc

I did have a crush on a boy in my year, and I'm very shy so I never really spoke to him but one day I built up the confidence and told him I liked him... He basically replied with "who are you" even though we had lightly spoken in class. So in other words rejection.

why am I single? I try to be more confident but I keep getting pushed down and I get upset when all of my friends basically make fun of me for never been kissed or been on a date...


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Because you live in the real world you clearly haven't been brought up to be a weed smoking slut. You are most likely the kind of girl that will have fun at a later age maybe at university or college. Just make sure when you get to college or university you take part in party's etc etc. As you grow older those are the luxuries you will love. also can you help me on my question please www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q1978336-girl-who-showed-signs-blocked-me

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Oh my god, no! D: Girl, you are 16! I understand that the culture is different now that it's 2016, and I shockingly see photos of 16 year old girls doing and looking like they are my age, but the thing is; I'm gonna sound cliche now, but you will get loads of time to do all that later!
    When I see girls at the age 16 now I think that they are children. And when I look back at when I was 16, I know that I was a kid.
    Don't rush smoking, drinking and hooking up because it will be chances to do that for the rest of your life.
    What I think, if I can get a little deep here, is that your friends is gonna be so worn out from all the party and sex when they are about 18 or 19 (when the best party years usually start), and they are going to settle down with their dirty high school sweetheart and have a baby by the age of 21 because there isn't anything else to be excited about anymore. But you can be fresh, ready for your young adult life and do it at your own pace! Anyways, later on, boys will much more admire girls who aren't so.. "used up and dead inside" sorry for the dark expression. ANyways, don't rush anything :) Hugs

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What Guys Said 13

  • It's completely fine if you are single and never had a boyfriend. Don't let peer pressure and people define your life. Don't let them influence you. Pressure is what you take, if you think there is pressure then it will be, if you think there is no pressure then it will not be.

    However things like pressure will only affect who are mentally weak.

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  • Let me ask you... For a second don't think about your friend or the fact that your single, so am I sister Ha ha. Are you happy? Because I've been single since my freshman year in high school and I'm well through college still single ever since. But I'm having fun and happy with who I am! I don't give a crap what other people think. I don't drink cause it's stupid, don't even get me started on drugs. But the point is, if your "friends" are really your friends, they should accept you for who you are. Not because you don't fit into their little click. If them teasing you makes you upset tell them, and if they don't respect that. Drop em. And also, don't worry about looking for a boyfriend. Because it will happen and should happen naturally. Just be patient bud :)

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  • They make fun of you, knowing it brings down your self-esteem? Not really the type of behaviour you would expect from friends. Try and ignore the discouragement from your friends, and keep telling yourself that you are pretty because one day, it will give you the confidence you need.
    And rejections are normal. Don't let it dishearten you :) I find that it's always a good idea to build a bit of rapport with other people before professing your crush. The more guys you can talk with, even on a platonic level, the more confident you will be in the future, trust me
    I wouldn't encourage drinking at this age, and definitely not smoking.. And to be completely honest, 16 is still early for a relationship. You have many many years ahead of you. You shouldn't worry about it :)

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  • So it does bother you lol. You just have a strong will. Anyways I would suggest simply learning to take this in stide. I get that its difficult, but sometimes when your friends tease you about that small of a thing its because they feel bad on the inside, that they were following what everyone else was doing and not what they wanted. Cut yourself some slack.

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  • I'm 20 and still haven't had a relationship, it isn't a race! Just go at your own pace, go with how you wanna go. Don't let others instigate your life :)

    My friends did the same... They were always pressuring me into losing my virginity, I have had a fair fee offers. But I don't do hook-ups.

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  • Don't worry about it. I was a late bloomer. i have no problem with it. i'm glad i waited long with sex, i do regret not telling crushes i used to have. sometime i feel i may have missed out on something, but don't try to get a relationship just because your friends have one.
    It's normal to be rejected sometimes, give a good cry, pick yourself up, and open yourself up for someone else.

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  • Are u ugly
    Are you boring
    Are u not agreeable.

    If your going after the party scene kids tour boring and just a downer. me and you will only be friends at school. Becuade u dont realte to that life style.

    Go find you guy who is clean drug alcohol free.

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  • Mark Twain said "If you have become like the rest of the masses you have to pause and do some introspection". dont despair for not blending in the masses, be proud about it.. ..

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  • It's ok. You are doing right for you. I never saw anyone I went to high school with after I was done.

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  • Can't tell without tpics OP

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  • boys are pretty much ass holes, leave them, they will screw your life up

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  • 1. No body likes alcohol. They just like the feeling it gives.
    2. Good job staying away from smoking. I won't call it bad for you but it's just healthier to stay away from it
    3. You're 16. I didn't meet the first girl I was actually willing to date till I was 18 and I didn't date her till I was 20. And then later found out that was a bad decision. Don't listen to your friends. They're all following the traditional path of jumping at every dating opportunity and all its really doing is hardening their hearts and letting them create bitter stories their future spouse will have to work super hard to undo the damage from.
    4. Why are you single? Because your human and young and being single is really just the totally normal default setting. Don't let your peers stupidity about status cloud your vision and force you into dating a most likely super immature guy. Just chill and focus on yourself. People who dive into dating too early tend to just create unhealthy dating patterns.

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  • It's normal to be single at 16. It doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you. There's more people like that out there your age than you realise. This whole "everyone's doing it" thing is just a myth. Do everything in your time. Not what everyone else thinks. And never cave in to peer pressure. It takes more guts to NOT follow the crowd. So nothing to be ashamed of.

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What Girls Said 10

  • "who are you" lmao how cruel. don't bother dating, high school boys are the absolute WORST wait a couple of years and get yourself a man
    s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/.../...8d5a602da3.jpg

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    • don't smoke or drink either, it's not nearly as fun as they make it sound. just get in to college and have fun there.

  • You're single because you live in reality instead of "partying it up", AKA being a responsible person. Don't give into peer pressure dude, your friends are going down some dark paths that are best left untraveled. You'll get a boyfriend when you get one, I don't understand your rush.

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  • Even in my day, this would have been an old fashioned response. I experienced the exact same peer pressure growing up and I DID have boyfriends. And I ignored all the advice people my age were telling me. BUT lol I will give it here anyway and maybe someone young will not be as stupid as I was.

    When boys are your age, they are not about love, only lust. And they are looking to have sex with as many girls as they can. Unless you have brothers, you are swimming in shark infested waters. What's this going to do? It will distract you from making the most of your potential. All the heart break and the drama will completely ruin the person you are trying to make of yourself!

    If I could do it all over again.. I'd wait till after I had finished school, had a decent job and then dated guys up to 8 years older then me. If you are 24 you should be dating age 30 guys. Because when they are 30 they are looking to settle down. And they are looking to settle down with a virgin or near virgin.

    You will then have them swarming over you will marriage proposals and you can then take your pick.

    TRUST ME.

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  • I had my first boyfriend at 17 or 18 and he was my first kiss. I still don't drink, get wasted, get high, because it feels unnatural to who I am and what's right for me (I have reasons). There's nothing wrong in being yourself and doing what feels best for you. And I know that at this age all you want is a boyfriend but honestly, if you aren't ready, or if you can't find someone, know you will. You don't have to be like everyone else around you to be happy

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  • Just be patient, you'll find someone eventually

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  • Don't get into a relationship if you aren't ready/feel like it/etc.
    The peer pressure is not worth to care about and you won't enjoy the relationship either.

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  • Sounds like your friends aren't that nice. It's nothing wrong to not had a relashionship at your age yet. The time will come, if you want it to. Let your friends know that you do not appreciate what they say to you. I personally have never smoked or been to a party with alcohol, and also too just tasted some without liking it. It's nothing wrong with you or me, just be yourself and don't give in to what other people say or want. You need to be comfortable.

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  • Just chill itll come with time im sure

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  • You'r'e 16 still lots of time to grow. Don't rush it. It will happen at it's own time.

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  • It's not just you, lots of people are single

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