I'm such a nice guy, and no one wants me, what's wrong with me?

I'm a really nice guy, I always mind my manners and am a good listener. Recently I've been a shoulder to cry on for my coworker, her boyfriend has been a real jerk and doesn't give her enough attention. I on the other hand give her a lot of attention and always buy her gifts and treats before work.
I think she has a crush on me cause she is always touching my shoulder when she tells a joke, I've never had any girl touch me before, so I'm certain she is into me. I always tell her how I'll be there for her and she always tells me I such a good friend. How do I get out of the friend zone? I would never do any of that rude macho stuff like flirt with her in public, or try and pick her up. I'm a really sensitive guy and I just don't know why all these macho men get girlfriends and i dont.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Do you like her? If so then you should try to bring up the subject of going out or something... Maybe try asking her which movie are you interested in watching lately? And after she responds you should say something like, (Really? Me too, I'd really enjoy going to watch it with you)... Which ever works best for you at least

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    • I've actually tried that and we went to see the new jungle book, she showed up and I bought her ticket, then j bought her candy and she asked if I could get her the biggest tub of pop corn, after I payed for it she said thank you for the big tub, and that her boyfriend loves popcorn. 5 minutes later her boyfriend showed up, took pop corn and went into the movie with us. I tried to out my hand on hers and she quickly moved it, I think if I buy you and ur boyfriend pop corn you should at least hold my hand.

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    • fIf I were a girli wouldn't want to date a guy like that. A guy who lets someone use them like that is clearly not confident and must have low self esteem or a poor grip on reality. You may think you like a guy like that, but they can nevr make you happy when there not happy. that's why most girls date confident douche bags, even though their douchbages the confidence outweighs a lot.
      I'm pretty lucky, I found a woman who wants confidence and masculine qualities, but doesn't want somekne borderline abusive and neglecting. I'm certainly not a "nice-guy" I'm more of a really nice asshole. But I certainly wouldn't be buying some asshole his popcorn while I'm trying to see a movie with his girl. It's all about balance. And being an overly sensitive dude who can't be confident is not my idea of balance. Well that ks for playing along !

    • dude, she is using you!!! Don't you get it, quit being nice because that won't get you anywhere with women and shit like this will continue to happen. Grow a pair and quit being a doormat. Stop being her shoulder to cry on. If you want out of the friendzone, let her know you are serious, if she wants to continue being with her boyfriend that is a jerk to her, RUN away and never look back. Life is too precious wasting your time on one woman. I use to be the nice guy like you but realized that is not what girls want, they want a jerk and you have to act like one to get them interested in you. Once she gives you a chance, then you can be the nice guy.

Most Helpful Guy

  • A touch on the shoulder doesn't mean jack shit.

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    • You don't have to be hurtful, I know it means something because she left her hand there for five seconds.

    • And it does mean jack, it means I jacked off after she touched my shoulder.

What Girls Said 1

  • Bring nice does not obligate a girl to like you

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    • I buy her a lot of stuff and I listen to her, I do t know why she wouldn't like me, I mean she touched my shoulder, if that's doesn't show romantic interest than I don't know what does.

What Guys Said 5

  • There is nothing wrong with you. It's just that women don't realize the value of a nice guy.

    However it's also true the women like nice guys but they like them as friends only, it rarely goes beyond that, that's the reality or that's what happens in most cases. There can be many reasons for that maybe a woman thinks a nice guys are not assertive, they are mentally weak and so on.

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  • There is so many things wrong with this question that I don't even know where to begin.

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    • What's wrong? Girls want a sensitive guy to be there for her. I don't mind if I'm her side guy, it's OK, I just want her to know I'm there for her.

  • nice guys dont get respect.

    you're doing it all wrong man.

    read 3 percent man by corey wayne.

    were you raised by a single mother? i m not trying to be rude... but a lot of men who are raised by women do not know how to deal with them

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    • My mom is a strong woman, she raised me and my 4 sisters by her self. Sometimes I struggled with thinking I might be a girl, but now I know I'm just a strong sensitive man, who will help any girl who's being wronged by their big headed man. Those guys make me so mad, they get all the girls and they don't even care about them. I've got class, and style, I always have my Fedora on with my suit. Why can't I get the girl for once.

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    • Yeah, a lot of women out there are user, but so are a lot of dudes to. I think to many guys put women on a pedestal. They make getting laid out to be this great achievement.
      I've slept with 7 different women in my short life, some of them just once, some of them to many time to count. And without a doubt the worst times were with people I had no attachment too, the sex wasn't very good and they were very superficial. After those encounters my quest to get laid suddenly didn't seem as important. And now I would rather go to the rifle range anyday than waste time chasing around one night stands.

    • i m like you man

  • Women don't like or want nice guys. Sorry but it true.

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    • Maybe some girls want a nice sensitive guy? I may not be able to change a tire, or shoot a gun, but I'm a good listener and I'm a romantic. Some girls got to want that.

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    • Oh... Ok Thanks for clearing that up for me haha so true

    • @Emojis201 well you wouldn't want to be with a guy who couldn't protect you from bigfoot or a bear would you? because "nice guys" arnt the kind of people who would be able to fulfill that inate need woman have for providers and protecters. Just like men needcompasion and maternal qualities to balance out their masculine qualities. Anthropology does wonders for teaching the real differences between the sexs

  • well I guess u need to be that macho man bro and start flirting like u shine like the sun in the sky

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    • Flirting is so unrefined , maybe I should write her a poem or sing her a song on our lunch break. She said we could go out for dinner tomorrow but I think she is bringing that meat head if a boyfriend.

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    • U know what I got confession to make I am a nice guy to girls what am I here acting like I am a bad boy answering this qestion

    • Look man, everyone is just trying to be what they think a potential mate wants us to be, were literally hard wired that way, it's how we perpetuate the species.
      But there is a difference between being a good dude who doesn't take advantage of a girl, and then being a spineless "nice-guy" who doesn't know how to act.
      Woman like "bad boys" because they are often successful and protective, and those qualities are what every female is looking for, it's hardwired in them too. But the best way to be successful with woman is to be a dick sometimes while still being a good guy when it counts. Don't ever be boring, but don't play it fake just to keep her happy.

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