My boyfriend told me that his father is dying and when I cried he said I shouldn't cry because I didn't know his father, why would he say that?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Because it's sort of true... why would you cry for the death of someone you don't even know, unless it reminded you of your own loss, in which case you're not really crying for the death of his father in the first place.

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    • Because empathy is a thing?

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    • @Checkers82

      I think this is the first time I've literally been blow away by the female responses... complete disconnect between what I perceived and what really is for them.

      That level of empathy is just unfathomable to me.

      And I'm ignoring the fact you just said you cry because "to me it just seems like the right thing to show someone you care". I don't think you meant it to come out that way.

    • ... Like to me crying with someone to show that I also care and feel how they feel and empathise with them seems like the right thing to do. When I don't cry I kind of feel like a stone hearted bitch.

Most Helpful Girl

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What Guys Said 2

  • He thought u were doing drama..
    He thinks of you as a drama queen.. - red flag

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  • Because he can't mourn if his girl is crying.

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What Girls Said 4

  • Wow, that's tough. I'd probably cry too, but I wouldn't want to do it in front of him. I know that when I start crying, my boyfriend instantly goes into "protector" mode and that might be annoying if he's the one who needs protecting. He's hurting and as much guys don't really want to admit it, sometimes they need you to do the consoling and be the strong one. As sad as the situation is, I think you should try to separate yourself from what's going on and just be there for him.

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  • Sounds weird.
    Seems like he may have some father issues.

    I would cry as well - I'd be sad for my boyfriend. Seems like a normal reaction to me.

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    • Wow... I must really be out of touch if people think that sort of response is normal. Never experienced nor heard of such a thing before. I mean, empathy... sure... but that just seems so far fetched to me.

    • @Sovereignty So feeling for your lover is a bad thing? Nice to know.

  • That is very odd. Send like a normal reaction to me. Even if you don't know his father, it is normal to feel empathy for your boyfriend.

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  • he's probably just hurting right now. Give him time, he's in grief.

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