Can you can figure out what I'm doing wrong?

Can you can figure out what I'm doing wrong?
So I'm a college sophomore, and I have never had any dating experience at all. I never asked a girl out or anything to that extent. It's not because I didn't want to. It's just I could never get close to a girl to know if I wanted to or not. Generally, what i do is initiate a conversation by talking about a assignment, the course, or something to that extent. 19 times out of 20 the conversation goes nowhere, because they are not interested. The 1 out of 20 usually ends up being a fairly lengthy conversation, but next class I can try to start a conversation with the same girl and nothing... It's rather hard to continue starting conversations when i get so down after a failed one due to my depression and social anxiety. It's just frustrating. I'm considerate, nice, polite, and intelligent, but from the looks of it I can't find a single person to make a acquaintances with, let alone find a woman who will start a relationship with me. i just don't know what I'm doing wrong. I know my social anxiety and introverted personality are to my detriment, but I'm not overweight, hideous, or rude. So I'm just lost as to what my mistake is. i've looked everywhere online for possible causes such as desparation, being boring, not being a active lister, arrogance, perverseness, but I just can't figure it out. i know it's not coincidence or just miss fortune, because it has happened far to many times. And if it is just because I haven't found the right person, well than more than likely I never will.


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What Girls Said 2

  • You don't have to try to talk someone for a long time in one day, instead try to talk to that person for 5 minutes a day. Try simple things like hey, is there any exams/essays/hw assignments coming up? Say thanks and then compliment her or something. After a long week be like hey how'd ur break/week go? and so on, talk about your schedules and which classes bore you to death and which classes you enjoy. Be funny !!! That's literally how I befriended like everyone I know lol. But yeah just try to talk to her for like 5 minutes a day and after a while she might even initiate a conversation!! Good luck!

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  • It sounds like you have poor conversation skills. Check out some self help books on the topic and that should help you out.

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    • I have. I've tried a few books and researched what people usually say is good advice such as: don't dominate the conversation, get her talking about herself, contribue to the conversation, try to be likeable, and be willing to adjust the subject of the conversation. I've tried it, and try to make sure I always do those things, but as I have said the results are just not there.

    • Practice makes perfect.

What Guys Said 0

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