Is 2 days after a date too soon to text?

So the other day I had an amazing tinder date. The girl had a great personality, had a bit in common with me, and was knockout beautiful. She was getting touchy feely with me and our conversations flowed very well. We even made out at the end of the date. Not to put her on a pedestal as I keep my options open but I definitely felt a click with her more than others I've dated with.

Anyways, I texted her 2 days after our date and still got no response. Does everyone go by the 3 day rule? Where if you text before 3 days you seem clingy, but if you wait, you appear uninterested?

This is why I hate texting and dating. It's hard to tell the mannerisms and people may perceive texts the wrong way and one thing you say they don't like, could end it all.

I generally can tell when a date's bad but the worst is when you have an amazing date and the person suggests meeting again, texting them, etc but then they disappear/flake on you. I don't try to over analyze shit but it's hard to to resolve a problem when you don't see one present.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I never understood the whole three day thing. Just text or call her when you personally feel it's right. If she doesn't like it then so be it. Don't let others influence the way you date with stupid rules. Be yourself.

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    • I never understood the 3 day rule either. If you like someone hit them up, you don't gotta blow up their phone but I don't get what's wrong with a casual "hey whats up".

      Maybe that's not the main concern. Maybe the real concern is her showing lots of interest and then ignoring me all of a sudden. Maybe it's possible she had other tinder dates as well. And I feel this is one of the double edged swords of online dating, too much competition.

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    • The antsy category

    • @_caaaaaaam antsy might be subjective, but I mean it is natural to wanna keep in contact with someone you like and seemingly fee a connection with compared to someone you don't.

      I don't exactly feel a click with every girl I've gone on a date with, even if the physical attraction is there. That alone isn't everything.

Most Helpful Guy

  • You said she was getting touchy, maybe she just wanted a hookup, that's why she hasn't replied to your text.
    Maybe she does want a relationship but you took too long to text.
    Maybe she's just making you wait like you did to her.

    I don't know, only she knows, but I think 2 days is too late to text. I don't like waiting, I see no reason for it.

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    • Yeah I think it's the whole thing that if one person doesn't text, the one texting comes off overly interested.

      I don't like the whole waiting shit either but ya know it seems like the whole thing has to be 50/50. Not 100/0

What Girls Said 6

  • If the interest is really there, games are overrated. I'd be inclined to believe, as much as it sucks, that she decided against pursuing the relationship. Third date is usually the make or break date. I agree, I hate being blindsided when it seems all was going so well.

    I hope I'm wrong and she responds back.

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    • It was only our first but yeah. I'm just gonna send her one more text today or tomorrow and then if nothing happens, next.

      Yeah being blindsided and just flaked out of the blue when there's no signs of anything going south fucking sucks. Story of my life. There's a girl I had a fling with in March, that I wasn't sure about how I felt about her but was open to dating if that makes sense and then after our 3rd date, she'd respond but never initiate texts and when I would ask her to meet again, she'd be busy but never reschedule and then eventually ignored me

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    • Aww, I'm sorry. I'd cut my losses and let this one go.

    • Yeah but here's the problem. I don't know if I'm saying or doing anything that's causing me to strike out. This has been going on for awhile and it's frustrating. I know what you mean about the desperation vibe but I don't feel like I give that off.

  • No! If a guy texts me three days later it is a turn off for me, not necessarily a deal breaker because if I like him I am still happy he texted. But, I hate guys that just don't do what they want to do and follow stupid "rules". I prefer two days, not three, and if they wait until 4 I might get nervous.

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    • I wish more girls were like you

  • wow that girl might not like you! Since she playing games! I know if it were me I would respond right away!

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    • Yeah, and it's like were both 26 and the mind games like that are still going on.

    • thats terrible!

    • Yeah and it's almost like some people think you're undesirable just because you don't know how to play their mind games right. Get the fuck outta here with that shit.

  • I wouldn't mind if a guy texted me the day after. Or even an hour after. I don't have the time to wait around and play games.
    Try to reach out to her one more time. If she doesn't respond, move on. She might be juggling between you and another guy/a few other guys and you didn't make the cut. Or she just doesn't feel the same way about you.

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    • Yeah I'm gonna send one more text then if I don't hear back, move on. I mean to be fair, she's not the only one I'm talking to. I just ended up liking her more than the others and her showing lots of interest got me attached to an extent.

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    • Right but someone else noticed this.

    • Well multiple people have by saying I go on too many dates.

  • You waited 2 days to text her back?

    What rule was that? That's way tol long. If the date went well you're suppose to text her back the day of.

    If I were her and you didn't text the night after I'd question myself on whether or not the date really went that well at all. Furthermore, if you finally decided to text me two days after I'd think you're just playing around with other girls and then just so happen to finally get back to me

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    • Yeah, unless a girl were to text me the night of/night after a date, id wait a few so I wouldn't appear needy, too eager to date. It's fucked like that but it's worked on some, others it hasn't.

    • Hasn't it ever crossed your mind that that actually makes you seem uninterested instead?

    • Yeah I'm getting that now, but it seems like the girls who were more interested in me were the ones I had no interest in or wouldn't put any effort towards.

      So are you saying from now on, going forward that I should at least text when I get home from a first date or the morning after?

  • She's not that interested we text back as soon as we can sorry bud 😞

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    • Would you suggest texting sooner after a first date?

What Guys Said 6

  • When I go on a date, that evening I usually send a text thanking them for joining me and telling them I had a good time. I usually get a response by the next morning. I believe that rule is BS. Just don't constantly text them, go about your day, respond when it is convenient.

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    • Yeah I think it's a BS rule. It's just tough when they don't initiate any texts after the first date.

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    • No I wouldn't. In fact, I ended up not meeting a girl because she was acting like a stage 5 clinger without even meeting her. She would say your texts take forever to send after I send them when I'd be at work. She also asked if I wanted help moving in when I told her I was moving into an apartment.

    • Not trying to contradict myself. I meant the whole point I'm trying to make is I'm able to get a lot of dates that seemingly go well that'll end with a kiss, making out, only for them to never respond or if they do, they flake when I ask them out. There's been sometimes where I'd have a good date and then when I'd text, I'd get "youre a nice guy... but" or I'm not ready to date.

      It's like become a trend. And even when I don't go into it, expecting anything, it still happens.

  • I just hate when people play the stupid childish games. Wait 2 days, 3 days what? That makes zero sense, I'd be onto the next girl by the time they text back lol

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    • Yeah it makes no sense at all. I think it's that whole thing of not appearing needy or desperate. The worst was when I had a girl who used me as a rebound, throw herself at me and come on really strong early on and then the moment I showed interest back, it's like now I'm this clingy/needy guy. Get the fuck outta here with that shit.

    • Honestly to me it appears more needy/emotionally insecure if someone plays games like waiting to text back, hard to get, etc.
      I mean, any girl that meets me irl it's obvious that I'm not needy or desperate, I think it's all about how you come across so no texting games are necessary.
      (Not trying to say you do or don't do this, just being rhetorical)

    • Right I gotcha like being overly conscius about how one comes off.

  • You're 25-29 and still adere to rules? No offense, but yikes. lol

    The way I operate is to be straightforward and honest. If I like a girl, I tell her -- and I tell her when I'm feeling it. If she can't handle that, then it's on her.

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    • Well it seems like a lot of people my age still play games and adhere to rules. Generally, if a girl were to text me a day after the date then I'd text.

      Unfortunately, it seems like the less interest I've had in someone, the more interest they've had in me. The only girls that wanted a relationship with me, I wasn't into and vice versa. And the one time I thought I was close to a relationship, I was rebounded.

    • It also seems like there were girls who were very interested that I liked or was open to continue seeing and then the moment i show interest back, then they'd flake.

  • Eh.. Has she read it though? Well, either she's playing hard to get , Or she's not interested. Either way, you should boot her out.

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    • I don't know, if she read it or not but I'm too old for mind games.

  • Maybe she's just busy. Shit comes up and you could just be reading into it too much. If she doesn't respond in a week ask her if she's not interested so you're not left waiting but don't pester her

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    • Yeah that's a possibility. She did respond yesterday.

      I've just experienced so much shit in the past.

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    • Yeah Im giving her one more shot and then if not, then fuck it.

  • I don't know as I feel like same. I do it always. She said me I am annoying. But when I said okay now I don't want to talk to you she was like no please talk to me. As I am Hindu she is christen as I don't want to change my religion. As I said her she don't have to change her religion into hindu because it's no need. But she wants me to convert. As if I can convert but she can't do the same so I just wanted to be her friend. And about you its true. Girls get annoyed. But some of them

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