For instance, why do some guys match on Tinder and not start conversations? But if I message them first, they will respond. I'm thinking of a few possibilities here: 1) they just use it for an ego boost 2) they're shy (seriously?)
What are your opinions? (:
Do you think there's a real possibility that they're actually shy? Or even shy guys will overcome their shyness to initiate conversations if they really like the girl?
guys have become so neutered, that a lot of them ARE actually shy online. Yes i know, blows my mind too... But i've seen it on GaG several times... guys confessing they are too shy to initiate a conversation with a girl online for goodness sake -_- This is why the times we live in are the absolute best for average guys like myself to get women. With just an ounce of confidence, you put yourself ahead of like 90% of guys these days, and girls end up noticing that. Anyways, it could also be for an ego boost but i wouldn't bank on that. That's more of a girl thing to do online
Do you mean someone looks at your profile, but doesn't message you... why aren't they? I can think of a few reasons:
* I'm too busy at the time. * You are outside of my parameters... like distance, so it delays me contacting you. Sometimes I reach out anyway, but often I just "like" them and move on til later. * I saw something that holds me back... anything that makes me stumble... like she says I like tall guys and I'm short, well makes me question if I'm a match, so I delay contacting. In this case the girl reached out to me and I responded and we hit it off really well. * I have a few chats/dates going so can't handle more * I'm not sure what to say, so I'm "sleeping" on a draft of what I'd say. I find that you can't just say "something", you have to come up with something worth her reading and said well. * I'm not interested.
If I'm online, I'm not going to be shy about reaching out. But I cannot speak for everyone. I've looked at a womans onlien profile from her side and she gets 50 msgs a day. Guys get hardly any that I've talked to... maybe 1-2 looks a week and rarely a message.
I am on tinder and POF. I will tell you the reason. I am just tired of being expected to be the aggressor. I would LOVE to find a woman that comes after me the way I am expected to come after her. And even if it isn't to that same level, at least show that she is interested in me, and not just chatting with a bunch of guys and wasting my time. So I purposely will not send any message to see if they are serious about talking. From what I understand, many women see Tinder and other apps like it as a "joke". So if they are doing it as a joke, and I am seriously trying to find someone, I don't want to waste my time. The other thing that is so freaking frustrating is that if I do initiate the converstation, and she reply's, then I send like a paragraph telling her something about me and asking her a question or two, then she replies with 1 sentence. Usually doesn't answer the question and sometimes doesn't even say anything about her. I will simply unmatch her at that point.
Here's the thing, guys know how much more women get msg'd than we do. Guys figure if you're really interested you'll message us over the 100 message you already do have. Also, free dating apps/sites are the worst. You find alot' of people are just there to look, they aren't serious about looking for someone.
The ego boost is something women do online, doesn't work too well for guys.
You do realize that guys can be shy as well. I don't know any guys who get an ego boost off of apps like Tinder. But speaking as a shy guy, I can easily see how a guy would be too shy to initiate a conversation.
And as far as overcoming their shyness if they really like like the girl. It's kinda hard to develop that kind of connection based on reading a profile.
I try. And I don't ask for sex/nudes.. I read the bios and try and find a common interest to talk about. I get ignored or blocked. That's why I stopped doing it, and in general, will probably just stop using dating apps altogether because these girls want a He-Man when they aren't a Wonder Woman.