Guys- Complementing other girls?

Why do guys think its okay to secretively tell another girl outside of your long term relationship that she is hot. I completely understand that men check out girls and what not. But why is it okay (over snap chat) to tell another woman they are hot.

Updates:
My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 3 years now and we just recently moved in together. I have talked to him about this before. He talks to other girls on social media usually snap chat, and (Generally) tells them that they are hot.
I don't know if this is a lack of respect, maybe he doesn't care what I think.

What do you think of the Situation? What should I do?
I am completely aware and okay with the fact the he checks out other women.
I am not okay with the fact that he wants other girls to know how hot he thinks they are.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Um... it is not acceptable to do that, where did you get that impression. I don't have a problem with looking at a woman and seeing her beauty, but then turn away fast (for the guys). But saying you are hot is wrong. Guys have to be reallly careful what they say to avoid displacing their LTR Girl.

    That said, if you are really secure in your relationship, he may feel comfortable doing that and it is all just fun and play. so depends on the confidence inyour relationship. In this case, it doesn't seem healthy as you phrased it.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Secretively = not ok. It implies they have something to hide, and implies they have some problems with how they view their current girlfriend in terms of trust or otherwise.

    If the girl asked for a compliment like 'How do I look?', I'd say that's ok, if they're friends, and the pictures aren't with an obvious sexual motive. However, if the guy is just going up to a girl and saying 'You look hot', that's a little bad. That just shows that the guy hasn't got the self-control to keep it in his pants. Why does he think it's important the girl knows what he thinks?

    I'm not saying guys shouldn't check out other girls. Sure they can, but they should keep whatever information private.
    And what does it cost him to keep his mouth shut? Does he get as much of a rush of joy from saying those words as his girlfriend gets a rush of insecurities from hearing him say those? Or less? It's usually not worth it.

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What Guys Said 7

  • it's not ok. it's just a matter of crass disrespectful guys essentially trying to flirt and push the boundaries of what is ok in relationships.

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  • i know this is hard to believe, but when we get into a relationship, girls still exist. i also know this is borderline blasphemy, but you are most likely not the most attractive girl anyone has ever seen... and wait for it, we still have have friends that are girls and compliment it... shocking, i know! a relationship doesn't mean the dude is gonna put a blindfold on and you're the only person that exists to them. the difference is that the guy won't act on it (usually)

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  • In what world?

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  • It's not okay? Guys who do that are not all guys.

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  • Generalising

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  • It's not okay. Complimenting saying she's pretty maybe but saying she's hot is not okay

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  • complimenting is okay, things like "hot" are too much

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What Girls Said 1

  • Why is that not okay? Us girls should be confident enough to understand that if your man complements or check out a girl it doesn't mean he'll leave you to be with her, he's just human, He can be completely in love with you and look at other girls. it's just natural *

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