I won't get into specifics, but I am feeling really conflicted.
Last night, this guy who've I've been seeing for a few weeks now, spent hours with in his room and bed, talking and kissing, no sex, told me for now we should not continue seeing each other. He then said to give it a couple of days from our incident.
The incident was basically.. I thought we were exclusive (not in a relationship but also not seeing others) and I guess we weren't because he was okay with talking with other women and open to meeting other women. I caught him talking to a girl online, well my friend set him up to see if he would fail... I was part of it bc I have dealt with so many dishonest guys... And I don't know, I just wanted to see what would happen. I obviously have trust issues and am damaged from my prev relationship. He knows this.
However, he fell into the trap. I Called him out on it... kinda bitchy.. Like "the joke is on me, I won't stand for this, etc." and I was kinda harsh. We talked through it and he says he's not upset and understands that it's bc of my past but he felt attacked and says we shouldn't see each other for now but we can still talk. He kept texting me but then I said we shouldn't. So we said our goodbyes... Then I said if he changes his mind I like his company. His response was that he likes my company too, & he said we should give it a couple days. Is this royally messed up? I like the dude and want to see the potential... But I don't know. I don't know if I'm the unstable one and or if HE messed it up.
Most Helpful Guy
Neither of you handled it correctly. You both immediately went on the defense rather that rationally having an adult talk and finding common / mutual ground. My marriage would not have ever stood for 18+ years if my wife or I attacked each other every time we spoke to someone of the opposite sex. Yea I know all about trust issues having been cheated on by my first wife and my first girlfriend and she actuall got pregnant from it. But if you choose to drag that distrust around from relationship to relationship like a ball and chain I honestly don't see how you expect any different out come than you just had.0
- Show AllShow Less