Why do some people think that love happens for everyone?

I've spoken to some people and they believe that everyone finds their "true love", "life partner", or "SO". I don't think that everyone finds it. There are people that leave this world not experiencing love romantically. I'm not referring to love by being loved from our friends and family. Totally different subject there. Not only that, what also convinces me that it doesn't happen to everyone is that there are so many people who divorce. Or even people
or couples that "fall out of love" with the other person. This whole "love at first fight" thing doesn't exist. That's a Hollywood thing that has somehow made a lot of people believe that THAT is what love really is. Some people call me cynical or negative, but I don't see it that way. I see it as a reality check. Nothing more or less. If you agree then that's cool. If you disagree, then you can explain why you think otherwise.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • only those who are open to love will find it. If you don't believe in it, it will be very hard for you to fall in love, because you're not really seeking it out or looking for it, even when in a relationship. We fall the hardest at times when we most want or need someone. If you're quite independent emotionally, it would be very hard to fall in love. Also, think about the countless people who have to deal with unrequited love. We don't always get lucky and fall for the same person who falls for us. Usually one person wants it more than the other. It's just a matter of pure luck, meeting the right person, at the right time, under the right circumstances.

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    • Ok. But what if we have a hard time believing that love will happy to us when it just never happens? Meaning like, I have opened myself up to others and put myself out there, but never had someone come my way. Are you saying that most people don't find many relationships because most of time, the feelings turn into a one way street of someone having feelings but the other doesn't? Because if that's the case, take my best friend for example: she's a lesbian and her dating pool is way way much smaller than mine. She's had a four or five relationships and yet, I haven't had one. I understand that we aren't all lucky, but sometimes, it can be confusing to see how things turn out. Maybe what I'm referring to is that some of us don't have the best luck or any by that means in the love department. Some times, I feel like I'm being tortured seeing all of my friends and family finding someone or settling down and yet, I can't even find ONE person? A little ironic on my part lol

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    • yeah, just get to know like you would a new guy friend or a girl you don't fancy. Push the thoughts of sex aside, girls can sense sexual frustration and desperation from a mile away.. I used to be like you, never played games and was so naive to the whole dating game. Didn't get me anywhere good. You have to play the game with most people. having said that, if you come across an inexperienced and obviously naive girl, please don't play games with her, otherwise, treat everyone the way they treat you until they prove to you they're worth being treated in a special way.

    • Trust me, I wouldn't mess with a women that has very little experience or just inexperienced in general. I'm kind of in that category myself. But yea, little games that people play is really dumb. Right now I have my eye on someone and I think it's because I find her very attractive but she's also pretty similar to myself as relationship wise. But there's a few factors why I won't talk to her right now. And it's because she's a friend of my best friend that lives in another state. So I've never met her. I won't send someone a friend request that I've never met before

What Girls Said 13

  • I agree with you. I feel like I'm going to be one of those people who doesn't meet their SO. It's really bringing me down, I'm trying to stay strong, but today was a bad day.

    I'm doing my best to stay busy, but sometimes when there are pauses in my life I can't help but think about it. I just feel so lonely.

    I have pets and I have a family, but I want a guy I can hug and love. I have so much love to give.

    So I'm thinking about making some sort of change in my life. Maybe volunteer or something. Do something to keep my mind off of being alone.

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    • You should. Maybe you might find someone with chemistry in an organization or something. It's hard to keep believing maybe you'll find someone.

    • i was flowing with this... until i saw "i have so much love to give".. I've heard that before... thats ominous...

  • I don't believe everyone "finds" their true love or love at all...
    But I do think that everyone has at least one person in the entire world that they are MOST compatible with in every way... While others have many people they are compatible with.. Yet some never find it for one reason or another.. Too shy, too isolated, not traveling enough and stuck with the same group of people for what seems forever!! Thus preventing from meeting other people whom they might be compatible with on the other side of the worlds.. Etc etc,..

    Anyway!!! That aside, I disagree with what you say about divorce or falling out of love... Just because many people divorce, it doesn't mean that they we not once in love so passionately at some point in their lives... Just because sometimes feelings chang with long periods of time, it doesn't mean it wasn't true love in my opinion... For me, if you truly felt love for that person, even if some years later you no longer feel the same, that was still strue love for me!! It doesn't have to last forever, even though if it does, well that's just awesome!! In so many ways if it's reciprocated... And I also believe hat you may love many people and some more than others, if you felt love at all, even at the smallest percent!! For me that's still "true" love... What differentiates for me is the person you felt the strongest for, that is your soulmate, wether it works out or not doesn't matter... And many people never find their soulmates, even if they experience "true" love with other people...

    I think I found mine. "Think" ... Maybe I'll be sure of it in the future.. ☺️!!

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    • I don't know if I'd call it "true love" even if you were with someone for a certain phase of your life. Or soulmate by that matter as well. But then again, I guess it depends on how the individual defines those terms too. My first encounter with a girl I liked back then, never amounted to much. I never really experienced love BUT, I did experience attachment.

    • If you didn't feel love, then it wasn't love.

      I'm not saying that love is anything you felt for any of your partners. You can like someone very much and be with them for a long time, if you never feel love, then it wasn't love. Just because you are with someone, doesn't mean that that was love, that's not what I'm saying.

      I'm saying if you ever felt love for anyone at some point, and then later no longer feel the same, it doesn't mean that it wasn't love, because you did feel it at some point... Just cause feelings change doesn't mean anything to me. And if you never felt love, then you can say it wasn't love... Cause you never indeed felt it at alll..

      Attachment does not mean love.

    • I wasn't saying that because we're with someone because we're in love. And I know that attachment isn't love. I was just stating what my experience was. Nothing more than that.

  • ... it's more like love CAN happen for everyone.
    It's not something that will happen without some effort and work put into finding and nurturing it, though. So for some people, especially the ones who expect love to find them while they're sitting on their asses, perhaps love will be something that they never get to experience.

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    • If love "can" happen for everyone, then everyone would have someone. Sometimes, I can agree with the "effort of finding" love but at times, it just plain doesn't happen. I've never experienced love nor a relationship but I haven't found someone close to starting a relationship with. At times, I feel like I'm trying too hard or too much to find something that may possibly not happen for me. I'll tell you the worst part about it, I see all my friends settling down, marrying or are starting something serious and yet, no one comes my way. I go out all the time looking for someone but never find someone. Been like that for the past 7 years

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    • okay but how do you know what those girls want?
      What their 'type' is is based off of nothing but your assumptions. Assumptions that everyone not only has a type, but also will never date or get to know someone who doesn't match that type.

    • i never saw your reply.
      I know what that girl likes because my friend knows her. She's a friend of my best friend. She's told me what she likes in someone and the one thing that keeps making me thing that it wouldn't work is because of that one factor. Not only that, I feel like my best friend doesn't think I have a chance with her. My best friend has made me learn how to not get my hopes up in the beginning but now I'm starting to think that maybe it's ok to believe that something could possibly happen or work.

  • Yeah If you try it does. But if you sit in your ass and complain nothing will happen!

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    • Nah, I don't just sit my ass down and do nothing lol

  • Ill take a nose dive and say not always... for odd reasons.. some people aren't destined on earth to experience love, but pain and destruction.

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  • Not everyone finds love there are divorces, independent single people, and people who just simply try too hard to find love

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  • I believe people say that just to make others feel better and give them hope. Not everyone will find love.

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    • That's why I always thought that maybe I won't find someone. I mean, everyone I know seems to be in something serious or settling down. Trying not sound depressing

    • I understand. My friends are beginning to enter serious relationships as well and I've never even got past a second date with someone. Maybe it'll happen, maybe it won't. Don't let it affect your happiness though.

  • They're hopeless romantics. It's what they do.

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  • Without adding a lot my belief is that the answer to your question is because they are na├»ve immature and uneducated and

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    • Good call. I wondered about some of those being like that.

  • It absolutely doesn't 😟

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  • A lot of hopeless romantics and delusional people who do not live in reality think that

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    • My first encounter was like that. She was always stuck in a fantasy

  • Just because you want it doesn't mean you'll be ready for it, if it were to happen, love can be found but people put up blocks unknowingly i think, your heart must be completely open to it in tune with it, you mentioned people who divorced but at one time they felt strong love for one another that led them to marriage, so in that case even though it did not last a lifetime, it's better to have loved than not at all or never ever having the experience of it, the love at first sight thing is usually lust at first sight mistaken for love, self love is the most important, many people hate who they are, their lives. their jobs, basically their life, now how can love ever find a way through all these blockages, just my thoughts on the whole thing, you don't have to agree but i know for sure we all are energy and that either attracts or repels.

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    • No, I understand what you're saying and I agree with some of the things you said. The only thing I'm not sure about is the whole loving yourself thing. I used to hate who I was before but for the past two years, I've come to love myself. I've met some people who've dated when they weren't happy and didn't love themselves. I just think that particular statement isn't the most accurate from what I've seen. Other people have said that but it just confuses me when I see otherwise

  • I don't know it's kinda sad always hoping that someone will find me or I'll find them and it never happens. I think it drains your energy so it's better not to think about it I guess. people who have the energy to think about it I don't know how they do it but I gave up around age 21 and age 24 now I'm still single never had anyone. I'm just trying to be content with being alone.

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    • I get that feeling. I moved to a bigger city after I graduated high school for the reason of starting a new life and finding someone to love. But that love never happened. I've learned to become more cynical. At times, I feel jealous, bitter, and angry when I see friends who have someone. I'm not upset at them but I feel like life sometimes just rubs my nose in it to lower my self esteem or confidence levels. I used to be VERY picky but a good while back, I learned to let that go a bit and just be open to anyone. Lol still haven't found someone. I just turned 26 and i know it's still a young age but I was expecting to find someone or experience something at least. I've just felt nothing but more loneliness and emptiness as the time has goes by. Like for example: I have a big crush one someone right now. It's a friend of my best friend. She lives in another state and is about to move back to our state. I want to believe that my friend will introduce me to her because we crack jokes

    • But at times i allow the negative side or denial part me get to myself because her friend only likes "white guys". Lol I feel like we'd be a great match but because of that stupid trait, she won't let it happen

What Guys Said 2

  • It doesn't... it really doesn't. Love is possible.. but most people (women) don't understand the amount of work that it takes to keep alive... its like having a pet panther... its nice and all to have... but if you don't feed it constantly, eventually, it will look at you as food and eat You.

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  • Because some people are stupid.
    The only thing that happens for everyone is death.
    Except for Lazarus.

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    • Maybe some are just hopeless romantics or believe in fantasies?

    • The only difference between stupidity and fantasy is how willing you are to admit it isn't real.

    • Hahaha that made my morning. But yea, I hear ya

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