My girlfriend and I have been dating for almost a year, and we've been through some rough patches but have always solved the issues. It just feels as though I'm putting most of the effort into the relationship, I post pictures of her all over social media showing her off, send her really really long loving messages, take her out to dinner or ice cream, I pay for the things we do when we go out, I hold the door open for her including the car door, I buy her flowers and snacks from time to time, I've been there for her for hours when she's needed me or if she was in the hospital, I text her good morning and call her beautiful.
But she barely posts me on social media, in fact most of the time its because I bring it up that she hasn't, she doesn't watch the funny videos I send her, she's only sent me a long message once or twice, and I call her every night to say goodnight and hear her voice before I go to bed. But if I don't call it doesn't happen. I keep the conversation alive most of the time when we talk over text, and when we haven't seen each other in a while I'm the first person to say I miss you. I've bought her a promise ring that was really expensive and I just feel like she feels I'm not going anywhere so she doesn't have to try anymore.
Even in sex she'll just lay there and let me do all the work and she doesn't even bother giving head even though its a necessity for me to give her. When I bring up anything that bothers me like I have in the past the problems will be fixed for like a week and she'll go back to doing the same things again. Is there something I'm doing wrong here? Or am I just expecting too much?
Most Helpful Girl
It sounds like she is taking advantage to me - you do a lot for her and don't sound like you get much back. With all the stuff you said you do in the first paragraph I'd tone it down - perhaps she might miss it and realise what you're doing for her, and if not at least you're not using all that time/energy/money and getting nothing back.
A relationship is meant to be a partnership, so you should both be bringing something to it.
Doesn't sound to me like you're expecting too much, you just want equal levels of input and effort.
If I were you I'd sit her down and have a serious talk about it, but give her an ultimatum this time, that she needs to change for good. If she can't you might have to leave her and find someone who appreciates your efforts, even if it hurts now it'll make you happier in the long term to be with someone who treats you well too.0
Most Helpful Guy
Talk with her about your concerns. Those things you mentioned are immaterial to me0