Why would a guy want to be friends with benefits vs in a relationship?

He's my ex... And now we are friends with benefits bc he doesn't see us in a long term relationship... But he can't tell me why, he just says he isn't in love with me anymore and doesn't see us going anywhere... I don't get it... We are very compatible and I have my life together. He swears he isn't seeing anyone else so it's not that... He is moving away and doesn't know for how long but he says it's not that either... So what is it?


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What Guys Said 1

  • You actually have to ask? Because it's free pussy with no commitment and he's still free to fuck others and he'll leave you when someone better comes along

    • He said he's not looking for anyone else... He's only hooking up with me.

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    • I believe him when he says he's not with anyone else

    • Your funeral

What Girls Said 2

  • Sometimes a guy just isn't that into you... just like there are guys that YOU aren't into. You might see things that you are compatible with but that isn't enough for a relationship and love. You need that special x factor, that magic, that chemistry.. if it's not there then no amount of compatibility will make up for it.

    • We do have that chemistry, passion, and X factor. I know he cares deeply ab me but for some reason he is holding back and won't let himself fall for me again.

    • It's a bullshit lie girls tell themselves.. "oh he is afraid of falling" . No, love doesn't work like that. You either love someone or you don't and if you do, you wouldn't want to not be with them if they are available.

  • It is that he doesn't love you anymore and doesn't see you going anywhere. Bad idea to keep hooking up with an ex. And it is not personal that he doesn't feel that way, feelings and chemistry sometimes just go away. I am sure you have your life together but it is just not what HE is looking for or wants right now, but someone else out there is, so just move on and find him.

    • If they go away they can come back and I'm not ready to give up

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    • Not really, you cannot explain chemistry and why it is there and also why it goes away. Maybe after the honeymoon phase was over and things settled down he realized that it was not exactly what he was looking for forever, or maybe he doesn't want a relationship with anyone. How long did you date for? Sometimes people change or just realize they want different things, it is hard to believe but it is usually not that personal, their feelings just changed and you did nothing wrong. You have to let him go away to come back or realize he wants to come back, I say back off and see what he does.

    • We were only together a couple of months but Iv known him for 2 years now. I will back off after he moves but until then I'm going to try and figure it out.