I have a friend i like.. i did ask her out once but she had someone else she liked.. was dating him but didn't last long. I have been thinking of asking her out agin since were closer and get along very will.. and everyone says we would be the perfect couple. But yea doesn't wanna have kids and i want 1 of my own. She perfect ok with adopting kids but does not wanna go through the pain of having a kid. I fine with adpoting a kid becuase its something i always wanted to do but still want a kid of my own.
Date? Sure, go have fun. Become boyfriend /girlfriend with? No. Its tough to hear, but you will save yourself heartache and future divorce. You want your own kid... and that is totally different from adoption. If you date her and fall in love, you will be struck with a strong desire for you two to have a child together... as in part of you and part of her creating life. And the fact that she says she's "open" to adoption means she really doesn't want kids. Yes, people can chose adoption for moral or human rights reason, but someone like that would react differently than what it sounds like she did. That person would say, "absolutely, I want kids, but I want to adopt." The reality is that she really doesn't want them or is undecided and doesn't know how to say that.
I used to say that I wanted to adopt because I didn't want to carry one. Then my current relationship really made me sit down and think about it. I realized I don't want kids and used adoption as an excuse. Because as a woman, we're expected to want kids. And if we realize its not for us, we get looked down on... so have to come up with excuses or say, "I don't know. Maybe someday." But its all a lie.
If you feel so uncertain about it that you need advice... that's your gut telling you its not going to work. Its painful, it sucks, but you both need someone with similar life values. That perfect woman is out there for you. So try not to feel discouraged 😊
I don't think so. I'm open to adopting or giving birth but I wouldn't date someone who didn't want any kids at all, there's no point. At some point, we'll either have to drop the relationship or have one person living out a life they didn't really want.
Absolutely not, I did this and realized there's absolutely no future with them. Kids especially are a huge deal to consider, if someone doesn't agree with you on this, there's really no point in considering to date them again.
Honestly? If you want different things your setting yourselves up for failure - either the relationship isn't gonna last and you'll both end up hurt and having wasted your time on one another instead of being out there looking for a better match, or you'll stay together and resent each other.
I did it once. I dated a guy that had one very different value from me, and though we had an awesome relationship and it ended on great terms, our one difference made a big impact on our relationship, and now I'd like to find someone with the same values. Sure, you can be different from me. In fact, I'd prefer we weren't carbon copies of each other, but I think everyone has a few central values that are really important to find in a partner, and it could cause problems later on, even if things seem great now. But it's ultimately up to you.
That's a huge difference. You'll be sorry if you get into something with her if she does not want to ever give birth and you want a kid of your own. Don't assume you'll change her mind (although there's a small possibility she could). I don't think it's a great idea.
And I was scared as hell to actually have a kid too but I did it anyway and wouldn't have it any other way. Millions of women do it everyday and we survived. It's raising them that's the challenge, not the birth!
If she gets an epidural she won't feel much of anything. Problem solved, with the pain of giving birth. The women I've spoken to about epidural anesthesia were glad it didn't hurt and it worked for them. However if she is being honest it will work for her, also if she has concerns of any kind about using an epidural she can discuss it with a doctor if that is her only hang up on long term dating and it leading to an exclusive relationship.
Me personally I wouldn't even ask her out again, if she ends up having feeling for you then that's fine but let her come to you. You've already been rejected once. You also shouldn't pursue her because she doesn't wanna birth any children which is something you want and that's not something people discuss things over because they're usually set on that kinda thing. Don't waste your time man, there's plenty of women out there that want what you want.