How should I message a girl on a dating site, what should my first message be?

  • Nice boobs me love you long time wanna date?
    5% (2)30% (8)15% (10)Vote
  • Find a common interest you two both have and tell her how you both share that same interest and you would like to date her
    51% (21)33% (9)44% (30)Vote
  • Use a cheesy pick up line
    17% (7)4% (1)12% (8)Vote
  • other something else
    27% (11)33% (9)29% (20)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Girl

  • If she has a profile, read her "about me" section and see if there's something you can mention or make a joke about. A common interest, her hobby etc. Make it as personal, interesting and funny as possible to differentiate yourself from all the other guys messaging her. Trust me, most guys start a conversation with hey, what's up and that's just so boring... Imagine getting about a hundred messages like that everyday. After a while you just stop responding altogether because you simply get too many messages. Besides, it seems like most guys just copy&paste the same message and send it to as many girls as possible. It's very impersonal. Personally, I appreciate when he actually takes the time to read my profile and sends a more personal message. It definitely stands out and I appreciate the effort so I'm a lot more likely to respond. I'm not saying that hey, what's up doesn't work but in most cases, the girl has to find you attractive from the start

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    • Personal messages may not work either but the chances of them working are probably greater. Although, it can be difficult to come up with personal messages for generic profiles that are lacking in details.

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    • @ChromAzonyx108 I've never heard of catfishing, never did it myself. you'd have to post a fake photo. If you have a lady friend, that's best way. or just do what this young lady said... she knows her stuff!

    • @ChromAzonyx108 Just don't respond to them

Most Helpful Guy

  • “You have a beautiful head. It would look marvellous next to the other ones in my freezer."

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What Girls Said 15

  • Mention something you noticed in her profile that you liked. Express that you're interested in getting to know her better.

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  • Find an interest that you have in common and start a genuine conversation about it. Try to make a real connection with her before you ask her out.

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  • How about "Hey sexy, I stumbled upon your profile and you happen to be a total 10/10 would bang so let's hook up asap 😏😎" 😂😂😂

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  • Cheesy cute pick up line. One that will make her shake her head but also smile along with laughing at your silliness.

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  • Talk about a common interest. Have a conversation before you ask someone out.

    Example of a good first message:

    I see from your profile that you enjoy pottery. What's the best thing you've ever made? Has anything ever turned out hilariously badly?

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  • Ayy bby u want sum fuk?

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  • I chose B but anything but..." hi, what's up, how's it going" is a good start.

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  • Be minus the "you want to date" part. You're on a dating site to connect and date. Assume that's what she's there for too until interaction proves otherwise. (i. e she avoids meeting up after you've spent some time chatting)

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    • I agree with you, but I wanted to mention that the majority of women I've talked to on dating sites DO prove otherwise with their actions, even if they *liked me first* and/or say things that makes it sound like they like me. It's very weird hahaha.

  • Lol that first one is enough for her to run.

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    • If I was a girl though I wouldn't be offended doesn't that make me speical?

    • Hahaha I think it's less about being offensive and more that there's just no indication you can offer anything besides admiring her boobs which is basically a given with any guy if he's not gay

  • use a cheesy pick up line as a joke, anything that could make her laugh or start a conversation is good. Also, try and use 'how was your day' as opposed to like hru or something short like that ((: (worst for me is 'sup' as a first message)

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    • age: 16

      women his age have heard it all, so they aren't as naive and persuadable as your dumb teenage ass.

    • @VegasNewFallout Firstly, I have probably had more proper relationships (4, 3 being over a year) than the average 24 y/o, like yourself, so I'd like to consider myself fairly knowledgeable on this subject and certainly accredited to comment my advice. Secondly, don't even consider calling me na├»ve and dumb- believe it or not (in your case probably not) I have an IQ of 169 and speak 6 language fluently (apart from my Portuguese which is a bit scruffy) 4 of which I taught myself. Thirdly, I simply cannot comprehend how what I am saying could be anything other than an appropriate useful (or maybe not) answer to his question. You are not needed in his comments, so please, have a little more grace and compassion before using such vulgar language to speak to anyone, in particular a minor. Finally, it's 'arse', us Brits invented the language after all mate.

    • Now you know full well that your post is too damn long to read an opinion I don't care about.

      Two options:
      Cliffs
      Let it go.

  • Find something you have in common and use it to start a conversation

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  • are you kidding me if you want to take a girl out on a date BE RESPECTFUL

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  • Just be yourself and see where that leads.

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  • send them a picture of your two inch shlong

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  • I would start off by introducing yourself and mentioning any common interests you have from her profile; and how much you would like to get to know her. I would she sincerely and polite.

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What Guys Said 7

  • As far as I have observed the mating rituals of women, it would seem that making light of something, perhaps her, and acting indifferent to whether you get to copulate with her seem to be the best way to go. Just try and hide your desperation and deep feelings of inadequacy, as much as possible, is the way I usually go about it.

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  • It is best on dating sites to keep it light and fun, and to show evidence in your message that you read her profile.

    Ex. "I see u like craft beer, but can you out-drink me? ;-)"

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  • Don't bother. She won't respond.

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  • Do not waste your time.

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  • "Even though you lost your youthful glow, I still find you somewhat attractive"

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    • Although this is kinda mean, but this will def get a reaction from any (or a lot of) girl/s. This might actually work on me 😅 and you can follow it up with something funny. Then voila! Good conversation initiated

  • Implying she's hot, "bonerific

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  • Ask her if she's from Ghana, or Nigeria. Really.

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    • tks for the like dude. Its true about Ghana and online dating scams.

    • Yeah there are scams everywhere though.

    • It'll become obvious, but they're slick. First sign is she'll ask yo to chat on google or Skype, not the dating app. If that happens, play her. Because they are playing you. Have fun. Pretty girls in Ghana.

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