I love my boyfriend yet I fantasize about other men?

Whenever I see a very attractive guy, I dream about kissing and having sex with him. Especially at the gym. It's not something that happened once or twice, but something very frequent.
Why is that happening to me?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • To me it sounds like either you're not attracted to your boyfriend sexually, or you settled down too early and want to sexually explore more.

    Attraction is not a choice so finding others desirable is normal... however the frequency and detail of your fantasies with other people isn't normal.

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What Guys Said 17

  • I think that's normal. Just because you're dating someone doesn't mean you stop finding other people attractive, as long as you don't do anything with anyone else, you should be fine. Don't feel too bad.

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  • Because you're not in love with him

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    • Could you explain a bit more?

    • Just because you're in a relationship doesn't mean we stop finding others attractive. But when we start fantasizing or acting on those attractions crosses the line

  • At the end of the day we're just animals that wanna bang lol

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  • You love him, but maybe you don't desire him enough.

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    • Yep, this for sure. Maybe loving him can be enough long term... maybe not. It depends on the two of you.

  • It sounds to me like you're not attracted to him. Of course here is the weird thing. My wife and i fantasize about others, Not because we dont love each other, it keeps thing spicy, plus it is not wrong to take pleasure from beauty, even if it is not your partners beauty. Its wrong if you act on it though.

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  • I wouldn't call that normal. Normal would be noticing some eye candy at the store, appreciating him/her for what they are, and letting it go. But if you're *fantasizing* about these guys, that's bad. I feel bad for your boyfriend.

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  • Keep your clam in your pants.

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  • Break up with the poor guy. You're obviously not in inline with him.

    Fact: If you're truly in love with someone you don't lust after other people

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  • Because you find other men more desirable than him

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  • you are admiring others form, looking/fantasising is fine

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  • You are human.

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  • i would do that to when i was in a relationship, but only about girls.

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  • Are you watching too much porn or something? ;-)

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  • You're thinking like most me. we can love someone and yet find other women very attractive and fantasized about having sex without involving your feelings.

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  • clearly to me that you will soon split. i mean you cannot say you love someone when you constantly think about other guys sticking it in you... it's clear that you desire for a change, for diversity.
    and about the love thing... you still believe you are in love because you got used to the guy and to having him around all day long. but don't forget that love is more than just having someone spend time with you

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  • Because that spark is gone

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  • So when you have these Fantasys do you stare a lot? I ask because I get some behavior from different women that makes me think this

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What Girls Said 1

  • It's normal he probably does the same thing.

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