Should I forget about him or wait for him?

So the first time I met this guy, he likes me immediately I see, because it's very obvious. Just because I saw he likes me so I didn't care much about him, but then I can't help liking him more and more. The second time we date, he tries to kiss me but I stepped back, I wanted to kiss him but I don't know why I did that, but then we drank a lot and we still kissed and had a crazy night, and we slept. We meet 3 times in 3 weeks, because exam period comes and we are super busy.

He just broke up with his girlfriend, we I was with him, his girlfriend kept calling him. I mean, he was with her for years and because his girlfriend calls him too much and not independent anymore so he thinks it's not a healthy relationship so he ended, but well, his girlfriend (or ex) still keeps crushing his phone all the time. Sometimes he got really annoyed and shut down the phone and later when he turns it on, tens of missed calls were there.

And now we have to prepare for our crazy exams, both of us are at home. We live far and want to concentrate on exams, so we can't see each other in 5 weeks. The last time I see, he said something like, "see you in 5 weeks, send me messages, I don't want to make you to wait for me for 5 weeks, but.." I said I can wait a bit.

And then I haven't heard about him until now, it's been 5 days or so. I can see he always turns off his phone, he just turns it on for a few times a day (we really need to study a lot lol), maybe because he doesn't want to be controlled by his ex or just maybe he wants to concentrate, I don't know.

So what should I do?

Updates:
Those replies are very interesting, girls say wait and see, whereas all guys say move on. Is it because the guys know that guys are real jerks and cannot be trustable?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Sounds like you got played.

    Some guys are good at playing the lovey-dovey card without seeming desperate, and what not.

    Guys can be trustable. As a matter of fact I have no problem saying that guys are more trustable than girls today. That being said, he was giving you the clear red when he said "See you in 5 weeks".

    "See you in 5 weeks" = "See you never"

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    • Ok. . .

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    • I want to know it clear why I got player? I mean thats very possible but I want to learn the lesson. Because of his girlfriend or something?

Most Helpful Girl

  • Don't wear your heart on your Sleeve, Should he Leave.
    It seems with even an "EX" that may still Mark an X in his Softie Spot, @kvjing. It appears they have a Bit of His and Her History and no matter how Many times She 'Still keeps crushing his phone,' He still has Not... Blocked her
    Go Slow with Joe, Focus on your 'Crazy exams, And just see what happens later. This may be more of a Challenge than his own Exams are, So with Space, Time is your Best Bet.
    I give you an "A" Myself for all of Your Effort. However, There is a limit, And I do believe I know you will Pass my own "Exam" with this Man.
    Good luck with everything. xx

    Good luck. xx

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    • hey, thanks a lot for showing me your opinion, I don't quite understand what you mean though lol

      meh yeah he haven't block her, but I think it's reasonable because he's been together for 4 years, although they may not be together anymore at least that's an unforgettable past, I also never block mine past. Actually I don't think his ex is a threatening, because I feel that their relationship is really fucked up: she calls him all the time and makes him very upset.

      Yeah definitely I would concentrate on my exams. But since he went back home last time, he didn't contact me for 5 days already. Although he said like "send me messages", but I sent him one message and he didn't reply. Now I'm already liking him, so I don't know if I should keep liking him :(

      thanks @Paris13!

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    • Thank you, sweetie, and Yes, I see where this is still going, He has not moved on from the skeleton in the closure closet.. No, you already have tried to contact him, Let him get a hold of you now.. Let him wonder more what else you are doing.
      Thank you so much again. xx

    • Thank you for the Vote of Confidence. xx

What Guys Said 4

  • He is just sleering with you turns his phone off cause your not the only one he is sleeping with... if your find with that then keep the relationship. I went to College had many exams also had many women... and when I met my wife in college all I wanted to do was be with her. All the time even when I needed to study. Soo...

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    • Thanks for telling your feelings, I'm really appreciate that

      Yeah that's very possible like what you said. But for our exam period it's very different and difficult, we call this period "block" which means every student stays in a room doing nothing but study, this is the most important period for us. He studies very very hard for this semester because he wants good result, and he's still very nervous about the exams so I can understand this point from him because I feel exactly the same, like everybody else. So I don't know, but still kinda having hope. Not sure if I should just kill his "hope" as early as possible..

      thank you anyway, so I should just let it go

    • Let it go... you can stick around I am pretty sure he keep you around and still play the same games if you choose to stay

  • Don't wait. Go after or walk away, but never 'wait'.

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    • what "go after"?

    • Okay, girls are too complicated for that language. I don't have a big endless social strategy to advise you with, normally you either do what you need to do to make the relationship happen. But it sounds like there;s all these layers you have in mind that I can't fully extract from your question.

  • Wait. Forever.

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  • another one bites the dust... you got played, move on. your better off.

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    • why I got played?

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    • and may I ask you did you even read what I wrote? lol

    • i read everything you wrote.

      me saying you got played isn't crazy
      me saying he is a messs isn't crazy
      me saying she is a mess isn't crazy
      you sleeping with him is a mess, look at you defending this moron.

      i really hope he moves on from you and you move on from him..

      its like the worse timing ever to go out with someone... but hey.. maybe your an emotional trainwreck lol

What Girls Said 14

  • It is still pretty new, you are both busy and he doesn't like that his ex is so clingy. So, since it is newer you do not need to text every single day or anything and you two are both very busy anyways. You could send him a text every few days, you don't have to wait for him to text you. Also, since he turns his phone off then he is obviously not on it very often and not one that finds his phone that important. I say in the next five weeks send him a text once or twice a week and obviously he is texting you a little too. Just play it cool since he is busy and doesn't want clinginess.

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    • thank you honey, that's the best way I think. But in anyways do you think he and his ex already broke up?

  • A watched pot "never" boils
    is the message that binds all these opinions together, however diverse they seem to be.
    When you begin to fill your life with other things/people to do, THEN he might surface and explain all things past to you.
    Obviously, you are not yet the air he needs in order to breathe and other things unresolved may be afoot, sucking down his free time, e. g. girlfriend trying to get him back, work/school, family, health...

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  • Sounds (kinda) like a long-distance relationship. Long distance relationships don't work. Plus, he is going to be super sensitive to any needy or clingy behaviors because of his ex. He may not even be over her yet.

    You should still try to contact him and either see if he has a really good excuse, or get closure so you don't have to wonder if he is still interested.

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    • Not long distance. He went back to his parents home to prepare exams

  • I think he is a player and you should learn from this experience and never trust a guy too easily even if he seems to like you at the beginning. It sounds like he repeated the story with his ex-girlfriend with you as well. He did the same thing like in her case, he refused to answer the phone. I think you should find a better guy for you. This one doesn't deserve you.

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    • Okay. Can you tell me in which behaviors he did that you can see that he's a player so I can learn the lesson?

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    • Well, if you give yourself this answer, then, wait for him and see what happens after both of you end all the exams.

    • Yes I will see, I actually don't care that he still sleeps with his ex or he's a player or he still can't forget about his ex etc, maybe because I don't like him that much. Yeah very possible that he lied to me, who knows lol

  • sounds like theyre not actually broken up and you were the other woman

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    • pff how can you see that? I really don't know but I think it shouldn't be, because he told me that he broke up several weeks ago or I'm being fooled

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    • hey, sorry but how old are you? I'm sorry but you sound like 18 not 28.

      For those who got blocked by the ex, it's maybe because these people do the same as this guy's ex (or gf) just being too clingy, but they just broke up after a very long term relationship so they still have feelings, I can totally understand that. If I were him, I would also not block my ex. I don't think that he didn't block her is a reason that they didn't break up.

      But of course it's still possible that I got fooled

    • well he's ignoring you like he's ignoring her.

      at the end of the day don't care how much you love him, if he cared he'd be in contact. there are other means of contact than his phone thats suddenly off all the time

  • I say move on, never put your life or feelings on hold for a man.

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  • He doesn't seem too passionate about you. Listen to your gut feeling about him. It seems to me u are making excuses for him.. because u like him. I would say move on.

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    • yeah true, to make excuses for others or for myself is my strong point

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    • But your question says ''Should I forget about him or wait for him?'' Anyway you do what you wanna do. I said my opinion.

    • thank you anyway! Yeah I'm changing too fast, I don't know why I even bothered to think about it, maybe the exam pressure is too much and I have to think about something else hmm

  • I'd move on.

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  • No. Do not wait. There is always that lingering nonsense with couples.

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  • Forget

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  • neither, get on the phone now, go out and buy condoms, get busy.

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  • He's still seeing his ex. No one lets an ex have that much control over their life unless they like it or have a child they are raising.

    Your question should be "Should I forget about him or become his 2nd girlfriend?"

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  • in my opinion he's just using you to forget about her. From what I see is that she likes him a lot and knows he likes her. I wouldn't call a guy 10 times a day unless I do know we can get back together. If I were you I would move on

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    • So you would call a guy 10 times a day? Despite he'll come back or not, that's crazy

  • I think it's only been a few day. Don't jump to conclusions yet

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