With online dating, do you usually expect the female to travel all the way to your destination?

I've noticed that in online dating websites, so far, the guys are always saying things like, "Do you come to the city often?" Or "Let me know the next time when you're coming to the city." Like seriously, Wtf? Whatever happened to being chivalrous? I believe that both parties should put in the money and effort to see each other. What can I do to make it known to these guys that I will not travel all the way to where they're at and that they should put in the effort as well to be fair?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You do know the overwhelming majority of guys on those sites literally just want sex... You seriously think they are going to travel hundreds of miles just to get laid?

    They say things like ''Tell me the next time your here'' and shit, So they can hookup with you whilst you visit... If they truly like liked you they would fucking move mountains to be with you. Not just some half arsed ''Come here'' bullshit.

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    • Notice I said online dating website. Not tinder. I've had this happen on websites designed for romantic relationships. Not hookups. Even if they want to get laid, they should also put in the effort to get some hole. Why should they also expect a female to travel hundreds of miles as well?

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    • If that's what they want, fine, but they shouldn't expect the female to travel hundreds of miles to go see them if they're the ones initiating contact in the first place.

    • Well then you're just talking to the wrong type of guy then.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Haha yeah on tinder when a guy says that I immediately think he just wants to casually get it in.

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    • Even If he wants to get it in, he better make the effort to get into the hole.

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    • they're dumbasses for going all they way to where they're at. I remind them that nothing is free in this world and they usually stop replying after I say that.

    • Haha yeah I've had that happen too. There are a few good guys though! Usually making the guy act chivalrous weeds out the bad ones 😊

What Guys Said 1

  • Omg. They're not asking you to come to them, they're asking to meet when you happen to be in the area. It's convenient for both of you. If he were to find himself in your area then he would meet you.

    And what does it have to do with chivalry? People's definition of chivalry is so degenerate these days.

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    • Because He is implying that I should be the one to get into a car and drive for hours to go see him. That's why. Otherwise, he would have never messaged me if he was never expecting a meeting. Let's be realistic. Most people aren't in NYC every single day if they live miles or hours away from it.

    • I don't think he's implying that. I think you're reading into it too much.

What Girls Said 2

  • Most people in the city will do that just because there's more to do in the city lol. I don't think it's so much a chivalry thing. It also is likely because they're actually not THAT interested. Any guy who really does want to meet you will make the effort I believe.

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    • Or Maybe they're just lazy fucks who expect to pampered by a woman. Even if there's much to do in the city, he should have the balls to pick her up or at least reimburse her gas money.

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    • Plus for the guy to pick you up you have to pick you up take you back to the city then drop you off again and then go back to the city

    • Well, he's the guy. He could at least choose somewhere to meet half way. If they're not interested, then why contact someone who lives miles and miles away? Obviously he expects the female to cater to him if he initiates contact with someone and has the balls to ask her to travel all the way to where he is.

  • Guys will travel if they like you.

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