My boyfriend has left to go on holidays for a month, but he's constantly fighting with me and saying disrespectful horrible things to me? help?

Hello I posted a question about this a few days ago, my boyfriend of 6 yeas left to go to Spain for a month on Wednesday. Now as he new I wasn't happy about it but obviously I didn't stop him. I just wanted to go on holidays with him as it would have been out first time going away. Anyways everytime we talk while he's away. We fight? It's horrible, but it could be the smallest thing for example, he rang me last night and we where chatting and I suggested phone sex sometime while he's gone or even just send him a few pics, he started shouting saying'I don't need pics I don't need to wank fine stop forcing me to do things' so I said okay. And he was like I'm hanging up bye. So then he text me and was saying absolutely horrible things ' you make me so angry, you make me fill up with so much hate, your so unsupportive and everyone else who talks to me while I'm away is full of love unlike you' he also said things like ' you keep starting fights with me I'll lose my interest for you, he told me to shut up, stop typing. Or if I sent him one more message he was going to block me' if I don't understand something he gets mad and says ' are you a retard seriously ' he called me a as hole and said I was ruining his holiday ( he went with one friend. Who I have never met) I text him when he texts me. I don't hound him. I know he's away. But it's like everytime I say something he just doest like it and starts a fight and then blames it all on me and twists it then I'm saying sorry and half the time I don't even no why I am? He hasn't texted or rang me since. What should I do from here now? Please I really need to no what I should do. I do love him and he tells me he loves me it's been 6 years. But he has acted like this even at home but not as bad. He said if it wasn't for his family he'd smash his phone up so I can't Contact him. I said I was just upset he went and he said things like'awwh poor you boo hoo feel so sorry for you ( just being smart) we are 23.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Seriously? Don't stay with that man. What you're describing is an unhealthy relationship. The fact that he says he loves you (wish may be perfectly true) doesn't change the fact that he isn't treating you the way anyone should treat his or her partner, and also what makes it a relationship, and not just two people who hate each other.

    Even if he loves you, don't stay with someone who is being so clearly disrespectful. Even if he loves you, even if he promises to make up for it, to behave from now on or anything such. If breakup is the only thing that has him change his behavior, then maybe breakup is what he needs. And you deserve better.

    • I 100 % agree with you. It's so bad since he's gone away. He claims I'm annoying him and saying I'm ruining his holiday. The thing is he won't even apologies for any of this. He never says sorry. He says I make him talk like that to me he says it's my fault. What should I do? He hasn't Contacted me since last night when all this happened x

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    • When he's here back home , we do fight about silly things yes and he does still be like this with me. He still might calls me names and he say things like ' you wreck my head you make me so angry ' or he'll just go a few days and not speak to me. He hasn't talked to me still since last might. Should I not contact him now till he contacts me? Xx

    • Yes. But if he's like this at home as well, I'd avise you to start packing your bags. Make a list (as exhaustive as you can make it) of all the negative things he's said to you.
      He can't stand you? He doesn't want to talk to you? He wishes you were out of his life? Fine. Get out of his life and find someone who can treat you like a human being.

      And keep the list. Because he most likely will come back, and will tell you he didn't mean any of what he said, and that he loves you. That's just his way of saying he's scared of being alone. But if he can't make the efforts while you're with him, let it go. Keep the list.


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What Girls Said 4

  • Maybe he wants to hit on chicks in Spain and mad at being with you. which causes him to not do it because of cheating?

  • Has he ever been abusive? And does he drink often? Also if u have never met the friend he is with it could be taking a negitive affect of him. Like the friend is a bad influence

  • fuck hell

    dump him really

    and i also am thinking about what @mustachekitteh is saying

    it has crossed my mind, i mean

    • So he wants to cheat? I'm so confused 😣😣😣😣😣😣😣😣😣😣

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    • its completely normal to feel like that

      dont hate yourself for caring about your boyfriend

      He should be the one feeling bad for treating you like this. You ask him simply to contact you and he reacts as if you're asking him for a kidney.

    • Agree with HookingSwan, best to not contact him and let him do it himself.

  • You keep mentioning things he's saying to you but not what you are saying to him. Sounds pretty one sided right now, you need to update the question to get an honest answer.