When will deactivating our dating profiles (how we met), naturally come up?

I noticed that after our second date Saturday, he had disabled his OKCupid account and this made me very happy (a lot of women have to nag about this), but scared at the same time. Did he really like me that much?

I didn't mention it to him, and after I met his family for Memorial Day yesterday, I noticed today that he had enabled his account again.

I actually told him last night that I had another date for this coming weekend planned and told the guy I was seeing someone else, whom I was clicking with more, and didn't want to lead him on. He told me it made him feel special.

Then, I see he's back today, which could have totally been him checking to see if I deactivated my account and, upon seeing I haven't, adding his account back.

When does this come up? We haven't talked about exclusivity yet, but his mom introduced me as his girlfriend. I didn't want to make it more awkward by correcting her. We shared our first kiss last night and during some of our conversation, I told him I wasn't about sharing passwords for social media, or going through phones - like his psycho ex - and he said that he was relieved.

I guess I just don't know when this whole dating profile thing will come up and if it will do so naturally? I don't want to seem like I'm rushing things or not being trusting because, technically, we're just casually dating and we're not a couple yet. Any advice?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I met my boyfriend on tinder, turned out he actually lived 3 doors down the hall from me haha, anyway, we never had to discuss deactivating our account. It was never brought up. I think we both just did it on our own time and never expected the other to do it in a specific amount of time. To this day I don't think it was ever brought up lol if it weren't for me using his phone some times I wouldn't even know if he had it or not, other then the fact I trust him. So I say, don't make an issue out of it. Until you guys make things exclusive just always assume he's seeing other people and if he meets someone else in the meantime then it just wasn't meant to be.

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    • I guess I feel like I was weak by admitting I cancelled my date with the other guy and then he adds his account back. I'm an over analyzer that trys to connect too many dots. Lol.

      He did tell me that he doesn't have much luck dating and that he's only been on two other dates beside me and they eventually fizzled after one or two. I guess that was his way of sharing that he's not dating anyone else either.

      I guess I shouldn't let our accounts bother me. He's just really shy and very much a go with the flow person, so I don't see him bringing it up.

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    • I decided to take a leap - especially after seeing he deleted his first and hasn't been on it since he added it back - and deleted mine. I don't want it to be a game. I like him, I don't want to talk to anyone else, and it's as simple as that. Plus, he's such a sweet soul that I really think I can trust him. He's not given me a reason not to.

      Thank you so much for the advice. 😊

    • Atta girl! Trust your gut, he's a nice guy, not trying to play you. Now you won't be tempted to go on and see if he deleted his :p

What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 1

  • It doesn't. Unless the conversation of being exclusive arises. My advice is decide if you like him. Also decide if YOU are ready to delete yours. If you do and are just bring it up. What is the point of dating if not to end up in a relationship? I know now a days it's uncomfortable to ask for a comitment but really it should be expected, especially if family introductions are happening. Good luck

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    • I guess I don't want to seem pushy and it's kinda made me want to retreat a bit since seeing that he's back on OKCupid, which is stupid because of anything, he should feel that way because I never deleted mine, despite telling him that I cancelled my date with the other guy.

      He did tell me that he doesn't have much luck dating and that he's only been on two other dates beside me and they eventually fizzled after one or two. I guess that was his way of sharing that he's not dating anyone else either.

      I guess I shouldn't let our accounts bother me. He's just really shy, so I don't see him bringing it up. He's used to a woman that gets on his Facebook and deletes people and controls him like that.

    • Sorry I haven't been on in a few days, hope you got somewhere with this. You souldnt wory about being pushy. There is a difference in voicing your wants and conserns vs forcing him into something he doesn't want. Some personal info on me, I was dating a guy I met online. He told me about a few dates he went on. I then dated others too. As months went on I really started to fall for him, but "didn't want to push him". Long story short I kept dating made a mistake, got pregnant to someone I was not nearly as interested in, and after I told the guy I liked he informed me he has been seeing a girl, and it was getting serious. Once we got the dna results to know for sure it wasn't his kid, they were in a committed relationship. For 9+months I stressed my self with "what if I just told him how I felt, that I wanted him to myself".

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