Is my relationship making me feel insecure about myself or is it just a personal issue?

I tend to over analyze EVERYTHING, so I'm not sure if my mind is just playing tricks on me or if it's actually my relationship.
My current boyfriend and I are attending college together and have been dating for about 7 months now. I'm his first girlfriend ever!
Last summer we had a summer fling but it wasn't too serious, and it turns out he was ALSO talking to two other girls. (Which I found out later) I then started comparing myself to them cause they are so so pretty. And I feel so bad because I started talking to him first and then they came into the picture. So i felt like I wasn't good enough. They then left for college and that's when we started dating..
ALSO i found out he would touch himself to other girls social media. People we want to high school with. (This made me feel horrible about myself) And I brought it up to his attention and he willingly just deleted all his social for the sake of our relationship. I wanna say he had this weird habit because he's never ever ever been with a girl and I'm the only one..
i feel like it was a huge shock for me. He's never had a girlfriend throughout high school but here I am, concerned if he finds other girls more attractive than me. Everything that has happened makes me feel so bad about myself.
Ultimately we are happy. We are always together and always going out together. But I feel so insecure.

I just feel like I'm average looking and not pretty enough. I'm very petite, and I don't have big boobs or a big butt. I've never felt bad about myself until I started comparing myself to all these girls he found attractive.
Him looking at other girls social media took a big toll on my self esteem. These girls has really nice bodies in bikinis.
I feel like he almost did this to me. Or did I do this to myself and just try to get over it.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Don't be. In the end he's chosen you and he's with you, and he sounds like a good guy since you said he just deleted everything so you wouldn't worry. All that stuff is in the past, and it's not that strange considering he was never in a relationship before. Even with those other two girls, he was just talking to them like he was just talking to you. You didn't really have any claim over him at that point, unfortunately, so you can't really hold it against him to keep his options open in case things with you didn't work out. Guys will objectively think other women are attractive, just like how we can look at a good looking guy and say the same, but that doesn't mean he thinks you're any less beautiful than them.

    • thanks for MH! I hope you feel better, I really do think you have a good guy :) don't get your insecurities get to you.

    • Thank you for the boost!!! ☺️

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What Girls Said 1

  • I think its personal, but you have no reason to be. You are his girlfriend