What do I do when the guy I'm seeing is still hung up over his ex girlfriend?

im 22, he's 28, we met a month ago. I know he is interested in me and we are seeing each other to see where it could go, but he has stated he is not ready for a relationship and jumped right into the story of his last long term (2 years) relationship of which basically ended because he moved here (to the us) from another country to start a life.. And his girlfriend cheated on him when she met a new guy.. Dumped him and dated this new guy and they've now been together for a year. I saw last year on April 25th 2015 she wrote on an Instagram photo of the guy I'm seeing, that she she loved him.. Yet literally may 10th 2015 or so she was already posting pics with her and this new guy.

he told me he has terrible trust issues now, doesn't want to be with someone and feel like he has to check up on them, be suspicious of everything they do, and all that commitment that comes with a relationship bc he isn't ready. He still follows her on insta and she does him... He sometimes likes her photos. I'm assuming he is still hung up on her.. Based on his behavior and how he is. He hasn't told me he is, but I just FEEL and know he is.

what do I do? Do I stick around and hope that he'll grow feelings for me to replace those for her? I feel like it's only wishful thinking. I don't want to be with him while he wishes he was with her either.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • i think you can be around him and stay close but i think you probably shouldn't really pursue or look for any relationship at this point.

    give him time and continue to be in his life and perhaps when he is ready to date you two can be something then

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What Guys Said 0

The only opinion from guys was selected the Most Helpful Opinion!

What Girls Said 3

  • It is what I Refer to here, dear as a "Full Circle problem Pattern" where Something or Someone Continues to go in a Circle with the Same Game, with the same Name, and it comes back Again... But I just FEEL and know he is.
    Yes, I agree with you that the skeleton that is still in his Cozy closet is Rattling your chains. He is Not over her, cannot get past her, and with their his and Her History... You have no Future with him.
    Move on. It isn't going to change Anytime too soon. He has not gotten over Her nor has He found any Closure because he is Hooked to her History Hip with the Long years they have had and still Do... Together.
    Good luck. xx

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  • I am going through a similar situation at the mo, met this guy have not strapped thinking about him from the day I met him, we dated for a bit & it was fantastic then out of nowhere he told me he is still hung up on his ex and that it wasn't fair on me to keep seeing each other! Perhaps he was just trying the do the right thing,

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  • You can't be with him when he's not over it yet. That's not fair to you

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