He can't get over his breakup with his ex. What do I do?

I started dating a guy a month ago. He is the one who made the first move and we spent all of our time together. He presented me to his friends, told his mother about me, I thought it was great, I got really attached to him. He was very king and affectionate with me.
But yesterday, he told me he was still recovering from his past relationship. He dated a girl for 3 years and it ended up very badly, he was in a very bad place. He told me it had an impact on his grades, his social life and that he wasn't ready to do that again, especially since he is in a law school.
He broke up with me.
He insisted on the fact that it had nothing to do with me, and I know it doesn't, but I'm frustrated, I know it can be great and I'm independant as well and need my own space, so I know we are a good match.

I don't know what to do but I need some advices to make it work, or at least to try.


Most Helpful Guy

  • respect his decision and move on.. that's what you can do.


Most Helpful Girl

  • It's Not going to work, Sad to say, @leahn95... He Is still recovering from his past relationship.
    He is being his own Honest John here, dear, in being Frank with you about having Skeletons in his No Closure Closet that still rattle his brain. He cannot have a Real Relationship at this time because he has not moved on from the Past that may or may not have been such a Blast.
    He didn't want to Hurt you Anymore by Continuing down a Pathetic Path in which he knew would leave you floating around in thin air with his Ghost from Yesterday and knew as Well... he could not promise Tomorrow with his own Sad Sorrow.
    Move on. If he Tries to Contact you with some Reconsider, You 'Reconsider' going back with him to a What will only End up to be a "Full Circle Problem Pattern with him and With... Her.
    Good luck. xx

    • The thing is that we shared so much in such a short time. He, apparently, told me things he had never told anyone and it is the same for me. I don't mind waiting, I just don't know what to do not to look desperate and needy. And if it doesn't work, I would like to be his friend and not make things weird.

    • Thank you for the Like dear.
      It seems there probably was a lot of great chemistry that was magical. However, he came back down to earth with getting scared he Might even Fall Hard for you and then hurt you and end up... Hurting himself as well with all of the Drama and the feelings for this Ghost of yesterday.
      You appear such a most amazing soul and I can see you with a Prince on a white horse and a white picket fence. I would love to see you go out and begin dating someone who is not hung up on the past. However, even if this Prince Charming came back to you, he probably will bring those Old "Lovin' feelings" with him in his side saddle bag. xxoo

    • 3mo

      Thank you for the Vote of Confidence. xx

What Guys Said 1

  • What else can you really do? Either try to help him recover or move on from this. If he's never going to let go, then you'll always be second in his life.


What Girls Said 2

  • I actually think it was pretty mature of him to break up with you knowing he hasn't healed fully yet. Maybe you see differently, but you aren't the one dealing with those conflicting emotions. I've been in his shoes before, and I promise it wasn't an easy move. Honestly, it'd be worse if he stayed with you to make you happy, knowing inside he wasn't. Maybe somewhere down the road you guys will get back, but right now just isn't your time. It's hard, but you gotta accept that, give him his space and move on for now.

  • It can't work because he doesn't want it to.