Will a past love prevent me from ever having a relationship?

I fell in love with my friend, which isn't a problem except that he never felt the same and he moved. We left on good terms... crying because we had to say bye, hugging, etc. It's been almost two months and I still think of him every day and sometimes cry over him. We talk on occasion and honestly I'd wait years for him if I knew there was ever a chance he'd love me back.

I'm scared to get into a relationship because I have feelings that won't go away. I know whenever I see my friend again we're gonna be hugging and I'm probably gonna cry from happiness. But no guy is gonna put up with me having an attachment to my friend and I don't blame him. It wouldn't be fair for me to not commit fully to a guy. I really want a family but I don't think I could ever love someone like I loved my friend and even if I did I'd still love my friend too and wouldn't be able to fully commit to someone else.

Will I ever be able to be in a relationship/find a husband or am I just gonna be alone forever? Honestly I don't even wanna mess with guys anymore after this but at the same time I really want to eventually marry and have a family


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What Guys Said 1

  • no, you can still continue on. you have to try.

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What Girls Said 2

  • Ah first love!

    You'll get over it but you have to stop thinking you won't. You are right, people will not want to be with someone who is in love with another, that isn't fair or right... but you will get over him. I'm sure you're doing things that will keep you thinking of him - you need to stop doing that. Are you looking at photos of him? Reading over texts? Facebook stalking him? He isn't your boyfriend, he doesn't love you in that way. You need to just get on with life and then you will be able to find someone else and see that they can make you happy.

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    • yeah we have each other added on social media cause we're still friends lol and we still talk on occasion and he's one of the best friends I've had so I don't wanna cut him off

    • You don't need to cut him off but you are a fair distance away now. It's perfectly natural for friends to stop being in contact so often, but you can still be good friends and be there for each other. I just feel that having close contact with him often, at this point for you would just make things far more difficult.

  • Yes just stop talking to him and you'll forget about him.
    Don't get in a relationship because it's unfair to the other guy. It can take even a year if you were very close to him, but eventually you'll forget. SOme people were married and forgot and moved on, the guy doesn't even love you back so you shouldn't give a damn about him and put an X on his name! You can find a man who loves you and he'll make you forget about him!

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    • I care though because he's my friend. He never hurt me. He's really sweet and respectful and I don't have any reason to hate him. It would be way easier if we weren't friends. And he wants to visit me at school sometime next year and I'll be the happiest person in the world while he's there but probably cry again when he goes...

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