5 months of dating and no talk about the future? Is this normal?

I've only ever had one other serious relationship and it was years ago when I was 18 so I'm not sure what's normal in the dating world. I'm 26 and my boyfriend is 31 we have been dating for 5 months now. He said I love you around 3 months. We have recently taken a trip together for a week. He is a good boyfriend and he makes me happy but there is one thing I find strange. We haven't really talked about the big things yet, such as marriage and kids in the future or what our life goals are. He is the one that has brought up everything else in our relationship but I find it strange that he has not brought this up yet. Recently coming back from our trip he told me he is sick of living with roommates. He asked me what my situation was with my roommates and I told him I don't know what will happen in sept yet but I need to find someone. He did not bring up is living together but I thought he was hinting towards it. He then said he was not sure where he wanted to live in the city and what his plan was yet but he mentioned moving in October. I'm confused, is it too early to be having these talks?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • What's the rush? Pushing for this stuff too early is going to set off alarm bells in his head.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I don't think it's too early to have the talks but I think it's too early to EXPECT to have the talks. I've been with my boyfriend for a year and we only just STARTED talking about stuff like that and it's not even "when we get married/move in/have kids" it's IF. We've taken our relationship very slow and I'm very great full for that because it's been the best relationship I've ever had. I know when he talks about these things he means it and it's not something he just says or does with anyone just out of convenience. We already agreed we aren't going to live together just because it's cheaper or more convenient, were going to wait until we're completely ready and sure. We've both lived with ex's and they both ended in disasters because it was so rushed.

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What Guys Said 3

  • Yes it is way too early

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  • It's 5 months... you don't date often do you

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  • There is zero benefit for a man to get married so either he is just very wise or not bothered. You clearly have no idea how much things have changed for men in today's environment.

    Having said that, after 5 months you don't know each other and telling you he loves you after 3 months... he doesn't even know what or who he loves.

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What Girls Said 2

  • yes its too early. you still are a new couple and still learning each other. That type of talk will scare him away so just enjoy being a girlfriend and as long as he is spending time with you and treating you good, everything else will fall in place.

    No reason to rush. Everything is going fine. , You just met him

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  • 5 months is a little early in my opinion, yes. Everything seems to be going fine, you guys do things together, he makes you happy, I would worry more if it was nearing the one year mark and nothing had been talked about.

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