How to hug a girl?

So some back story first: I'm 20 and I've not really had much experience with girls but now after a few dates and pretty much asking a girl I'm now in a relationship. We went out to see a movie and through most of it I was trying to think of ways to hold her hand and about 40 mins in a just asked. So we held hands during the movie and after that we held hands until we both went home. Other dates have pretty much just been hand holding and that's mainly because I have no idea how to initiate or ask to hug a girl and how to actually do it, and that's what this question is. Obviously after I've done this once, it will just come naturally but for now I just have worries about it.

The first thing I'm confused with is how to actually initiate a hug. We're either doing something like sitting down across from each other eating or sitting next to each other watching a movie, etc. The only other time when we're not doing that is when we're walking somewhere or when we are saying goodbye (since we both live at different sides of the city and take public transport from the same place). I don't want to randomly grab her and hug her, having never done it before, while we're walking and I don't want to stop her and be like, "can I hug you?" Other than that, when we leave, we get different buses and we say bye to each other when we see one of them coming so there's not really a lot of time to stop and hug, unless it's really quick and unmeaningful. How exactly do I approach this?

The other thing I am confused with is the actual hug itself. How do I do it? Do I put my arms over her shoulders, and then what do I do with my hands? Or do I put my hands around her waist? How long do I hold, how tight?

This all seems, and is, very non unimportant and after I do it for the first time it will be easy and I'll have nothing to worry about but for now I can't help but focus on this so I don't do something wrong and she gets the wrong impression about me.

TLDR read the last two paragraphs


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What Girls Said 1

  • light hug. Don't be creepy in feeling boobs or something :D

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What Guys Said 2

  • I myself is short with physical contact with girls, but a female friend 'taught' me how to hug a girl. There's only a few factors into it though, and there's different kinds of hugs. A girl should usually wrap her hands above your shoulders, so you should wrap her around her waist. Make sure both hands are completely open and on her back, even if you feel her bra, and just hold tight; don't let go. Never give her a pat on the back. You should do the rest by the 'moment'. This is how I started, and slowly learned hugging and different kinds of hugs. Also, I feel related to you (I think you're asocial and extremely shy at first) so my best advice is to just play around; fool around. Even if you make stupid rookie mistakes cause it's your first (if I'm right) relationship, just look at her and giggle like an idiot. It'll make the relationship healthier.

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  • Just gently wrap your arms around her. Just be aware that to girls getting hugs from their SO it is an endorphin rush. Dont be surprised if she takes it as a sign that she can hug you... a lot.

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