I'm only 18 but was scalded as a child with boiling water down my right arm and neck. throughout winter my scars are mostly covered under sleeves but I'm really self conscious in summer. I feel like it's the first thing people notice about me and that I then become "the girl with the scar" rather than a person. Are scars a turn off? would you find a girl with scars unattractive?
Most Helpful Guy
"[...] become "the girl with the scar" rather than a person [...]"
I think this is mostly you projecting your insecurities. Every negative kind of social encounter will then start to seem like the scar's fault, feeding an insecurity which then leads to more negative social encounters as a vicious cycle.
For me scars generally aren't a turn-off unless they're self-inflicted. Even then, it's not the scars that are a turn-off so much as what they might say about a person, but I'd still try to give them a chance to show me that they've become emotionally stable. I might even fall in love with a girl's scars, attributing it uniquely to her.0
Most Helpful Girl
I understand why you feel uncomfortable with people seeing you not for you but for a scar. The scars not you, if people choose to only see the scar they lost a great potential friend. I admit at first I would notice it but after I got to know you that would pass. It's just a scar, it's not you. There's nothing you can do about either except and embrace it or let it control your life (may be a bit extreme but I have a similar problem so that's how I see it). Scars a normal thing people get in life. If a guy finds it unattractive that's his problem not yours. I know people may be telling you to "love your body flaws and all" which is a bad thing, we would all be better off if we thought that way, but it's simpler said than done. It will take time but you can you will eventually be more confident and comfortable with yourself if you push yourself and be more open. For example if you really love a certain dress or shirt but you're scared the scar might "ruin" it then wear it. You will start to notice that people don't mind. If you met someone with a "flaw" you may judge/notice it at first but if they show their confidence despite the scar then you'll like them more. If I were in your shoes I would push myself and experiment. There will always be people who won't be able to see past it but those are the people you don't need in your life. Just live life, it's short so don't let a scar hold you back! To answer your question, no scars aren't a turn off. (Depends on the scar of course) I have had friends who have been burned badly and there scars never bothered me. Rock it, be confident, and screw the people who think otherwise.0