How does attraction to height work?

This is more addressed to women, but men are welcome to answer. Anyways, I don't understand how someone can be turned off or turned on by someone's height. I mean, I've never factored a lady's height into how much I want to fuck her. I've just never ogled a sexy woman and thought "she's totally hot, but the fact that she's a few inches too short/too tall just totally cancels out my arousal". Seriously, until about two years ago, I couldnt even tell you how tall my crushes were. Hell, I can't even tell you whether or not the women I've dated were taller or shorter than me--it just didn't factor in to anything.

Could someone explain this whole height dynamic?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I guess for me it has a lot to do with comfort? I'm only 5'2 so even with my 6'0 boyfriend, his height isn't so great to me because yeah, I find him super attractive but damn, I wish I could kiss him when we're both standing up straight without having to physically climb up onto something :P So yeah, if they're really tall, it's gonna put me off because it can be uncomfortable.

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    • Yeah, I get you. I wonder if sex would be more intimate if it was easier to be eye level... you know? I am 5'3" and my Husband is 6'4". My serious boyfriend before him was 5'5 1/2"... we never slept together but the kissing was much less awkward. Kissing isn't awkward anymore though you get used to it... it's weird but for the first little bit it was so awkward the height was kind of almost a turn off just because it made things so difficult-lol.

Most Helpful Guy

  • They like feeling protected i guess? I think most are just happy with a guy taller than them - which is the vast majority of men.

    I won't lie once girls start getting over 6' they seem disproportionate to me, because if they're slim they look skinny, if they're broad they look... big lol. I mean they can be attractive but take them down 2-4 inches and i'd find them so much more so.

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What Girls Said 13

  • If they're too tall, it's a bit of a turn off because I'm so short.

    This is too much imo:
    i.dailymail.co.uk/.../...C00000578-860_468x658.jpg

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  • I'm considered "tall" for a girl but not super tall. So when I get to encounter a guy where I can actually look up into his eyes and he can look down into mine, it's an instant turn on. It makes me feel more feminine. Height is also relative to strength and my female instincts say that he is strong enough to protect and provide for our unborn children. It's also a cue on how fun sex would be because I'd get to *climb* him.

    Occasionally I've been attracted to shorter guys or guys just at my height but it's more personality based than actual looks. I feel like I could break him or that if I fought him, I'd win. In an altercation, I'd be the one protecting him. I don't feel as feminine with a shorter guy. I'd assume he's much younger or physically weaker which are two qualities that I don't find attractive when selecting a mate. He'd have to excel in other areas for me to develop stronger feelings for him.

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    • Unless the guy is really tall or really short, height doesn't correlate very well with strength. It's weight, muscularity, and frame size that do. With all due respect, I'm not particularly tall (5'8 or so), but I'm fairly strong, and I've met few men who best me in a melee--let alone any woman.

      My point is that you'd be best to question your preconceptions, because they're flawed to say the least.

    • I wasn't posting to debate. I'm telling you how it works from a taller female perspective. I know short guys beat tall guys all the time but none of that stuff crosses my mind when I see one out on the street. Taller men immediately come off as being more masculine to us even if he's not ripped. I'm personally attracted to taller men because I feel like he's bigger and stronger than me who is already taller and stronger than average girls. His height gives off the sense of being someone who can provide protection or who can dominate in bed. I'd feel safer with him because people looking for trouble would think twice before approaching. That's just how our instincts tend to work.

    • Well... I hope that women with those "instincts" are in the minority, because I wouldn't want to date a woman who doesn't think rationally.

  • It's the feeling of being protected and it not only height. I like taller guys but my boyfriend is barely taller than me. Yet I am extremely attracted to him because he's mascular and he's very protective of me.

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    • Okay, so you're saying it's the feeling of protection?

    • Absolutely that's why most women's dream guy include being tall and muscular.

  • My boyfriend is 6ft 2. I am attracted to tall men. I guess because they seem more manly. That is how I feel.

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    • Fine, but how does height act as a turn off or turn on? It doesn't really change anything physically.

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    • I don't like men.

    • Sorry... do you understand me now? It is just like... some men think a big butt on a woman is sexy. You might not think a big butt is sexy. That is some men's definition of sexy. But now yours.

  • For me... I am used to tall men and need to feel overshadowed, powerless, tiny, fragile and breakable.

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    • Can't you feel that from a muscular, strong man of just average height?

    • Tbh, I really don't.
      I guess this all began with my father and older brother.
      People can't help what they are naturally drawn toward

    • Well, okay, I still find it pretty weird.

  • Doesn't affect attraction to the other gender. I find tons of shorter guys hot but in my head it's "damn, why am I taller than him?". I just won't date someone shorter, even if they're attractive.

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  • if i have to crane my neck to look at him then my neck is turned off

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  • it isn't being attracted... it is being comfortable.
    i am 5.7 and being a woman i hate to date with guys shorter than me.
    so when i see someone longer than me they attract me.

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  • Easy
    Tall=big=manly

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    • Sorry, but that's a non-sequitur.

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    • Men are usually taller across the world than women so it's considered feminine.
      Females are usually a curvy shape so it's considered feminine universally.
      It's not rocket science.

    • Sorry: Men are usually taller across the world than women so it's considered masculine.

  • I'm 5'7, is that too tall?
    The dude has to be 5'11 or taller for me but there are exceptions

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  • For me, I like tall guys because they make me feel protected. I'm a shy person, and being around someone tall just makes me feel more secure

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  • It doesn't actually bother me if a man is taller, shorter or the same height. I'm more fussy about body type. I know many of my friends prefer the man to be taller, but I'm not sure why.

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  • Its probably leftover from when the paleolithic era, taller males were attractive to females because they tended to be better protectors and providers. And men were attracted to women based on their breasts and hips because larger of both meant that birth was safer and that the child would be able to survive later. Its basically instinctual now, a guys height isn't important anymore in our day and age but for whatever reason, if a guy says he is over 6'.. HOLD ME BACK

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What Guys Said 1

  • As someone who likes girls who are taller than me, I can say it's kind of because I like the way it feels; the dynamic of having someone that height and the fact that I feel quite uncomfortable otherwise, like I'm dating a child or something. Uhh, that's the best I can explain it. XD

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