I'm a bisexual girl and I've been crushing on a guy for 8 months now. The feelings I have for him are way too strong and intense and it's the first time I've ever felt like this. Nevertheless I went out on a date with a girl I used to know (she's a lesbian) and we keep talking all the time and she asked me out today again. I like her and I feel happy when I'm around her, but I feel awful because while I'm dating her, I am constantly thinking about him. He shows interest but he's very unstable and he plays hot and cold all the time. There's also a big possibility that he may ask me out.. on the other hand I think that maybe nothing is going to happen with him and I'll regret it if I stop seeing the girl, since I like her. Soon or later she's going to ask me to be her girlfriend or something like that and that's for sure going to happen. I'm afraid because maybe if that happens he is going to talk to me and ask me out and I know that I will.. I can't help it. I messed up things for good and I don't know what to do. I feel so bad for her and myself too because I don't want to hurt hee but I don't want to hurt my own self either. What should I do?
Most Helpful Guy
I don't think it's fair for the girl you are dating that you're dating her even tho you obviously don't care that much for her. I think it's really selfish of you to keep her there as "back up" if the guy never asks you out.
I mean even if you ignore everything else, just the fact that you are obsessing over another person is a reason why you should stop dating the girl, and what makes it even worse is that its been going on for 8 months.1
Most Helpful Girl
Ask the guy out and let the girl go. You will regret it othervise. The guy is maybe not serious, if he acts hot and cold. But you'll never know if you aren't gonna do something! He might just be hesitating because you are dating the girl. And the thing with the girl doesn't seem so serious. You have no deep feelings for her and it is only fair to let her find someone who truly is interested in her. Trust me, you'll feel better if you give the guy a chance.1