When would be the right time to talk about your health issue to a person you are seeing?

i had a heart surgery when I was little, i might have to get another one in few years.
i've been dating this guy he is a bit older than me... Like 12-13yr older and he is very intelligent... Genuine.. Caring kind soul and romantic... I could feel that im liking him more and more everyday

i have a big scar on my chest and it was not easy to open up to people and have a serious relationship with someone because of my health

should i tell him when he is about to see my scars... or.. When we become closer?
we have been dating about a month now and i think i finally get to make love 😳


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I don't know about when, maybe soon if you're going to make love, but I think "how" might help. It might be nice to embrace him, cuddle, talk gently and warmly, build that warm kind of affectionate tone for each other. Then tell him gently. That would allow you to tell him in the most comfortable kind of setting.

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    • Especially since you've been kind of guarded about this all your life, and you're falling for him and exposing yourself to him, you might be in danger of falling madly in love with this man very quickly. Be a little bit careful with that for the sake of a healthy relationship. If you're not used to such intense feelings for a person, you might not have the experience to deal with the side effects that can follow (fear and insecurity). Try to remember not to play on those fears and insecurities ever so that you don't risk the health of your relationship. Falling in love very quickly tends to requite a lot of emotional maturity to handle, since you develop such intense feelings for a person but haven't been through rough times with them just yet.

    • Thank you

    • I was trying to click mho button :( sorry

What Guys Said 4

  • LOL, its normal try to be confident okay. Its not some ordinary scar or like stupid scars on face off course its due to operation. I think you have bypass it usually left pretty big cut like scar but again ITS FUCKING NORMAL. People have scars on cranial side of pelvis on skin due to surgical removal of appendix.

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  • Just tell him. It's not that big a deal.

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  • I would wait until they proposed. I dated one girl that told me all of her medical problems after dating about 2 months. After she told me every thing that was wrong with her I didn't want to date her anymore.

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  • Seems like the guy is the first one who said "hello" to you in, say, 20 years?

    No wonder you're going to love him "so much."

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    • I have dated other guys before but he is different. Do you think it is weird that i developed feelings so fast?

    • Don't hell him before you enjoy being bonked, though.
      If I were I'd tell him after the bonking, only if he asks about the scares.

    • the scar is on her chest. they won't have sex without him seeing it.

What Girls Said 3

  • I think you should tell him whenever you feel like it, I doubt he'd be running for the hills but it would just let him know not to be concerned perhaps.

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  • You should tell him if he truly does love you then he will understand and help you through it and it will bring you closer.

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  • Sounds like you're using your health as a reason not to get close to anyone. That's not fair to you. You deserve someone amazing.

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