Major trust issues?

So my boyfriend and I have been dating almost a year. In Jan. I found out he was talking dirty/texting a chick I worked with as well as flirting with another girl I work with from the time we made it official-Jan. I confronted him and we talked and we decided to move past it. I do check his phone once a month because it's hard for me to trust he won't do it again. I love him and his son (the mom wants nothing to do with the child). I just can't move past what he's done. I don't think about it constantly like I use to, but it's still hard. He has made continued efforts to show me he's not gonna do it again, and I know he's truly sorry for what he did. The night I confronted him and left he cried and his mom and grandmother texted me asking if they could help and how he's never done this before and they want us to try to work it out. I guess my question is how? How do I get past this?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Once things get broken you can temporarily fix them
    They can never be perfect like before
    Think about it yourself

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Well; you can't. Just like you don't ever truly get over a person close to you dying. You just learn to cope and deal with it. You have to remind yourself daily of the fact that he has making up for his mistakes and that you need to see the person he is today and not the person he was yesterday. There's no magic recipe to make it go away. It happened and you will always remember it. BUT change your perspective on how you see it. Instead of viewing it as negative; see the things he has done to show you he loves you for real.

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What Guys Said 2

  • i think just time and continued effort to build trust in the relationship

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  • That's disrespectful he shouldn't be flirting with other women in a committed relationship. If a girl did that to me I'd dump her ass pretty quickly... then again I think I'd have better judgement than to get in a relationship with a sloot.

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What Girls Said 2

  • I'm in the same boat, even though my situation is not as extreme as yours. I'm sorry you have to deal with that.
    The thing is that, once trust is broken, it is so hard to rebuild it and it can never truly, fully be restored (in my opinion). But if you truly want to give the person another chance and forgive them, you can do it. I think you should stop check his phone as well. He seems to have realized that he messed up, so give him responsibility. If he's gonna cheat again, there you can dump him because you will have given a chance and he would have busted it. Keep talking about it with him. Communication truly is key in a relationship.

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  • Your relationship is doomed.

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