My boyfriend is 22 answer I'm 21. We have been dating a little over with years now.
I have slept over before, but some of those times were that my boyfriend never asked for permission because he knew the answer would be no. I have gone out on his family outings to places, but I had to sleep in one room with the females and the males slept in the other. And one time, surprisingly, me and him were able to share a bed at his grandmother's house due to the room arrangement problems.
And so me and my boyfriend had planned this idea of me staying over for the night at his house since us two were hanging out with friends. It would of been convenient. I asked him to please ask his father for permission in text and his dad pretty much said no. Now, I feel a little weird because I don't want his dad to think of me in a different light or be upset that my boyfriend asked or that there's some sort of problem. I don't know, am I overthinking it? I've always tried to get close to the family, and it feels like I'm not accepted yet.
I find that he doesn't bother to ask his father for permission very wrong. He is in his father's house. It's not that your not accepted, its the fact that it's his father's HOUSE, not his, and he's being very disrespectful. It's very obvious as to why his dad says no. Because you two are bound to or going to have sex, and he doesn't want it in his home. Your boyfriend is making you look very bad and his father has the right to scream about it. And no, your age has nothing to do with it either. Your age doesn't make you an adult. It's the fact that he lack respect for his father. So anything that his dad is upset about, blame on your boyfriend. I would not tolerate that in my house either.
It has nothing to do with not liking you. It has to do with their values about sex. My family would never let a girl sleep in my room, unless maybe there were separate mattresses and the door was open.
Well obviously you're both of age... You seem to be in good perspective in front of his family... I think the first thing to do would be to ask why he said no... Plus considering you're 21 and 22 I don't see why there is any permission to be had...
They could just ultimately have some sort of moral rules its their house which means their rules, after all your boyfriend still lives with them. perhaps like most parents his father said no just because he's scared of you guys interpretng as if you can do it all the time or feel free to have sex al the time there which I know isn't the case but his parents don't know this.
My mom loves my boyfriend but initially she was hesitant about us sleeping together in a room. Only much later did she come around. I doubt it's because he doesn't like you. He might just feel weird about knowing you two could be having sex under his roof.
Well it's their house and it's all about respecting their house. If you've slept over in the past without any permission that's disrespectful as hell. Either the two of you move out and live together, or you just deal with them not wanting you to sleep over.
He knows you're having sex in his house and he's not happy about it. Unfortunately that's his house so you'll have to stick to the rules. Doesn't mean he doesn't like you. My parents never cared so I could always bring whoever I wanted home tbh.
He just doesn't feel comfortable with it. Doubt it's that he hates you. Your boyfriend is making things worse by having you stay, not asking, and not telling you he hasn't asked though. I've been in that position a few times with friends and felt so self conscious because I knew they might be thinking a little bit badly of me, so I just made efforts to be super polite and bring little things round when I visit the next time, like drinks or snacks or something. Your boyfriend was disrespecting his parents home, but you're not to blame, and he knows his son well so he will probably know that it wasn't you.