Boyfriend hiding weed from me?

Me and my boyfriend have been together a little over 3 years. When we first met we both agreed that we were not into smoking weed. We both felt this way up until the past 5-6 months ago. During that time his grandma passed away and with all the stress going on he decided he wanted a break. During that break he openly started smoking weed to cope with his feelings and stress. I tried to be understanding since he was very close to his grandma and we were technically single. However since we got back together I reminded him how I felt about smoking weed. I have smoked it in the past before I met him, but I just feel like for me it isn't something I need or want in my life and I would like a significant other that felt the same way, and when I met him I was led to believe he felt that way too.

So recently it appears as if he has been smoking but he won't even admit it to me. Like I know the flavor since I have smoked it and I can smell and taste it on his breath. And his eyes will be super red and glossy and he just looks stoned. But when I try to ask him about it he gets mad that I'm "Always accusing him" of smoking. It makes me feel like I'm going crazy because I'm 99% sure I'm right but he won't admit it.

So I honestly don't know what to do. If he had smoked weed before I probably wouldn't have been interested in him and I wouldn't expect someone to change a huge lifestyle choice of theirs but this is something we both had agreed on. I mean right before his grandma passed away he even went off about not wanting to be friends with someone because they smoked weed a lot and he couldn't stand people like that. I'm not anywhere near that extreme, it's just not something I want in my relationship.

What are your suggestions?


Most Helpful Guy

  • His excuses for using is bullshit. He's always been a pothead and that's all he'll ever be. You can't trust him so you have a decision


Most Helpful Girl

  • He's grieving. So leave him be


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What Guys Said 1

What Girls Said 1

  • If this is a deal breaker for you then you need to find someone else. Obviously the weed smoking is more important---otherwise he wouldn't touch it out of respect for you.

    Just my opinion of course...