Is it Okay to Date a 16 Year Old Girl?

... Even though I am 20 years old?

I asked this about a year ago when she was only 15, and resolved to wait since that was too young. But now that the girl in question is 16, would it be okay for me to ask her out and pursue a relationship with her?

Long story short, I am 20 and there is this young Greek girl at my Church whom I really like. She is 16 and very mature, an oldest sibling like myself. I have a massive crush on her but I am afraid that the age gap is too large for us.

I would never have sex with her, not until we were married. So the law is really not a problem. But would it be okay to date and be in a relationship with her provided that her parents approve of it?

How should I go about this? And no, I do not believe that there is anything wrong with it since prior to 30 years ago, such age gaps were common and there was nothing wrong with it.

@redeyemindtricks @CheerGirl38139 @OlderAndWiser @snowangle


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Honestly I think she's too young. The next 2-4 years of her life are going to be full of so much growth, learning and self-discovery. You're an adult at this point, and she's still what I consider to be a child. Maybe it's a really good match, but at this point in her life, I don't think it'd be good for her.

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    • Thank you. I already waited 1 year. I guess I can wait 2 more until she is legal.

Most Helpful Guy

  • I think there are a few questions to ask.

    1. Because she is a minor, there is the potential for conflict with her parents and especially with her father. If you do want to date her now, you should first ask her father's permission. You can assure him of your intentions and this will help to gain his trust.

    2. I don't think the age difference is a problem per se. It is a question of maturity levels. Is she sufficiently mature that you would be dating someone who you can accept as an equal when it is time to make decisions of any importance? Will you think that her inexperience makes her opinion less valuable than yours? Will she be able to say "no" to you and have you respect her decision?

    3. You are an unusual young man (and I mean that in a very positive way) and I am wondering whether you will have sufficient common interests with her or whether you will feel that her interests are not as nature as yours. Will you feel proud or silly attending her senior prom when you are 22 years old? Will you feel proud or will you feel the need to explain or apologize when you introduce her to your older friends and family?

    I don't need for you to answer these questions for me. When you answer these questions for yourself, you will know whether the time is right. Please do keep up posted on your decision and what happens if you do decide to pursue the relationship.

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    • I'm gonna go with this. If she's worth waiting for, and it's meant to be, you can wait 2 years.

      If it's supposed to happen, it probably will. 🙋

    • Thanks you two. That answer was very helpful and has given me a lot to think about.

What Girls Said 5

  • Honestly , no
    I remember thinking I was a grown up at 16, crushing on 20+ boys.

    But after one year I realized I was another typical somewhat immature teen.

    I don't know how to explain it but it's not about the numbers but the mentality I guess.

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  • I don't think there's anything wrong. 4 years isn't a lot anyway

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  • I just don't think it's fair to influence someone at that age, to the degree that you can from your current age. I don't have any issues with age differences but the mind state that she should be in at that age (whether she's mature or not) is just so different than that of a 20 year old.

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  • Its okay. You're only 20 really and age is just a number anyways. It's not like she's 14 . She'll be 20 in only 4 years

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  • Why not wait?

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    • I have been since she was 15. I was wondering if it would be okay now that she is 16.

    • Well wait longer... if she's worth if youd wait

What Guys Said 5

  • It MAY be legal if the AOC in your state is 16 and you either fit or don't have laws regarding how much older the partner to a minor may be (in my state the ZOC is 16 but only for 3 years older, so I can only date 17+). Also, AOC applies to more than just sex. Even having a relationship at all may count.

    Either way, I wouldn't date a 16 y/o girl if I were you. Sure, their innocence and youngness is attractive, but they aren't adults and thus can't handle adult, mature relationships or understand how much responsibility sucks.

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  • No its not okie and it's not a thing a man would do

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  • Nope. If she is 18 and you are 22, yes.

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  • fuck da haters and go for it. i see no wrong. ur heart is in the right place.

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  • Of course, it's natural.

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