What's Her Motive?

OK so here's the deal a year ago my ex and I broke up because she was stressed and obsess with getting into college and she wanted to " not punish me" because I probably won't see her. We stay friends for about a month then I like never hear from her. A few months later she starts dating this guy. She breaks up with him a couple weeks ago cause she found out her was a "weirdo" (her words) and starts talking to me again. Ill admit that I've missed her conversations cause there always funny and insightful. Anyway, yesterday we were talking about my Jr. Prom and if I went. I didn't go. She then kept asking me why didn't ask/ take her cause she would've gone. Then today we were talking and she told me to "true...shut up! lol :)" I said, "No you can't make me :P"she said " Oh yes I can :-)" I said "I doubt it cause your all the way over there and I'm all the way over here so you can't make me lol"and she respond " well I guess then Ill have to show you later :-)" . Is she into me again? or is this some kinda rebound thing? or is she just joking around? Please Help!


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Most Helpful Guy

  • To answer you question... I think she may be into you "again", but I think she's trying to play the field in away. Things where changing in the distance part of her life, and then she started to have feelings for another guy. That's why she broke up with you, before she started dating that other guy. People do those things, because distance relationships usually don't end up well, and secondly she had feelings for someone else. But with the distance portion of things, it really depends on how stable the relationship is, and maybe she felt like it wasn't. And maybe she may have found some interest in that guy before she broke up with you, so in a way I'd be a little suspicious with her actions, because it could be a rebound thing. I'd hate to phrase it in that way, but it could be apart of her finding out her emotions with you.

    So within your actions, you need to express to her your feelings behind what happened. You seem to be a little disappointed, and probably hurt over what happened, based on the breakup, and then not hearing from her, and then finding out she started dating another guy right after you. Now I'm also wondering how long the gaps in between you, and that other guy? Because I don't really respect people that decide to go into a relationship, and then break up, and then get into another one right after. It's not a healthy habit to do that. People need time to understand there feelings, and make sure that there doing the right thing for themselves.

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    • Spot on. Yea I was crushed when she ended it, I mean it was on my Birthday. But yea I agree with you. Also, the last comment really helped. "Its not a healthy habit" is right. She may not be in love with me, she may just be in love with being in love. Thanks Man

What Girls Said 1

  • its alittle bit of all 3 man

    dont go for her, she'll just hurt you again

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What Guys Said 1

  • She's not joking around. I can tell you that for sure. That might however be her way of trying to find out if you still like her. By "joking around," I mean, you pretty much factored it in. So if for any reasons you may strike up old flames, it falls on you, not her. Because like you said, she's "just joking around."

    I hope that made sense, what I was trying to say, is that she's making a pass at you in a not so sleezy way. You can't accuse her of trying to get back with you because even you don't know what that meant.

    However, while I don't think her intentions were bad for breaking up with you. I think she may have thought, what we all think, college parties, liquor, sex and a good time. She didn't want to be held down by you while she went away. Hence her new found love interest who just casually turned out to be a weirdo. He may have been the one that broke up with her, and if that's the case, what I'm about to say may make more sense to you.

    Her being dumped may have impacted her confidence. And, we all know it takes confidence to get anywhere. So she goes for a quick fix, someone who she's already been with who won't put her down. Instead make her feel better, you. Hence, your running rebound, and your job at the moment is, to either; as she puts it: "Let her shut you up" or "No she can't."

    Honestly bro., that sounded like foreplay. Sounded as if she was trying to tease you. "Catch me if you can." She tags you, and you chase. You put her in control for your own gain. Except she's now reverse the technique. She's tagging you, for her own gains.

    How I know, because I've tried that... I've told a girl "Shut up!" play fully, hoping she'd go for it and respond: "No; make me!"

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