I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for over a year and I recently found out for half our relationship he was talking to his ex on social media (there were about 3 other random girls he spoke to) and only stopped because she blocked him. When I confronted him he tearfully confessed that he fancies her more than me and that has made my self esteem a total mess. He keeps saying that he wants to focus on us because I am more important than her but I really can't get past how hurtful that is to me. Should I try and work through it or is it time to let him go
To him you were second choice. Since his force choice blocked him his making you his priority now. I'm not sure what you'd want to do. He spent half of your relationship talking to his ex and another random girl. That would be heart breaking
Obviously that's not an ideal situation but to his credit that's pretty incredible he was actually honest with you about his feelings towards his ex. The dude still has feelings for his ex... when it comes to matters of the heart, logic usually goes out the window and emotions do what emotions do. I wouldn't blame you if it's too much to deal with and you decide to end things, but if you want to give things a chance to work I'd say his honesty seems like a good starting point. But you guys have lots more open & honest communication that would need to continue happening on the reg. Good luck either way.
You shouldn't be an option, he doesn't need to focus on both of you, but on himself. He needs to get over her before he can jump into another relationship, and you shouldn't be the victim of the situation. Believe me, i've been there - the guy I was 'seeing' broke up with his ex to be with me, and guess who went back to her a few months later... it's a waste of time. You deserve somebody who focuses on YOU and YOU ONLY. Good luck x