I am so frustrated by how slow my boyfriend moves in the relationship?

My boyfriend and I have a great relationship, however I can't help having small niggling doubts sometimes. These doubts come from the fact that my boyfriend never actively pursued the relationship to begin with. We started off as friends with benefits and it was me who started wanting a relationship.
I feel like I am always the one pushing forwards and sometimes this gets annoying. My boyfriend is a great guy and a very good boyfriend, however I feel hurt sometimes that I always have to be the one initiating each stage of our relationship. My boyfriends moves so slowly and is very cautious. He always over analyses every decision, and before me he never had a girlfriend. It literally took him half a year of dating to finally ask me to be his girlfriend. Now I am resenting him because I feel like he is still quite shy to post pictures of us on social media. He is never that active in pursuing things. It makes me wonder sometimes if his hesitancy and indecisiveness is a sign that he isn't really as into me, or that it is just his character. I know that he only really fancied another girl before me, and I got the feeling that he really wanted her. She rejected him. I wonder if things would have been different if she was his girlfriend instead of me. Maybe he would have been more active in pursuing her and been more keen to show her off to his friends and family. I can't help but be quite frustrated sometimes. What should I do? Does he love me? Am I being unfair on him?


Most Helpful Guy

  • You have a choice to make, then. Either accept that he's going to be a turtle, or break up with him. You must realize that many guys are analytical by nature, and not just go-with-the-flow types. So this is likely just the way he is. He may not be for you.

    • Thanks bigjake. I would never break up with him. However I am more worried by the fact that the length of time he takes to analyse things means he might not like me as much. Is this possible?

Most Helpful Girl

  • Have you tried talking to him about it?


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What Guys Said 1

  • The social media thing is bullshit and shouldn't have any influence over things.


What Girls Said 1

  • tell him that,,,