I hung out with a guy I met a couple of weeks ago over the weekend and noticed he seemed to be avoiding sitting close or touching me at all. for example: our arms grazed each other and he seemed to be shocked by it and quickly pulled back. it confused the hell out of me. I thought he was interested but now I just don't know. I'm used to guys (that are into me) finding any excuse they can to touch me.
what do you think? not interested or something else?
As per the enclosed blog link http://edumckaytion.com/blog , men are conditioned to believe that even looking at women is viewed as offensive & predatory , you have to agree that Western " society " does view male sexuality as " pervy , rapey , disgusting " etc. I will never be dating again as my situation ( i'm a single dad also works FT ) does not allow it , but I would NEVER even attempt to touch a woman I've just met , I would maintain at least 3 ft of distance for her comfort , if we both liked each other & she closed the distance / touched first , then I may touch back.
It could be any number of things TBH. I remember there was this realtor at a house that was smokin hot. She stepped toward me and I took a step back. Even though I found her quite attractive, it's just my instinct. I'm naturally "jumpy" and sensitive to other people's energy fields.
I don't want to touch other people in general, including girls I'm interested in that haven't shown interest in me back. The reason being I think touching me when I don't want you to is a gross invasion of my personal space... but I also recently realized that sometimes girls show interest by touching you, so I'd keep an eye out for that. I'd follow the girls lead but sadly I think I'd shrink back if touched unexpectedly out of habit :( . Also there are people who think guys touching girls like that is creepy or rapey so I'm definitely not going to stick my neck out and be judged completely wrong either.
I would like to use excuses to make physical contact, but at the same time I'm terrified of seeming handsy or creepy. If at any point any of those excuses don't fly, I'm ruined. I think most guys are hyper-aware of any physical contact they make with girls, especially if they have interest. So shying away can be just as just much a sign he's interested.
Yes, he's into you, just scared, nervous. Ask him about his relationship past, he may not have one. Soumds a bit like me. You have to ask him about how he feels around you, and you may need to do some work to get him to say it.
Actually Yes! when I had a crush on this girl during my freshmen year of college I was avoiding talking too much, to I don't know maybe not to mess it up. I think she also liked me, she also wanted to walk after class. But yeah so the point is that some guys actually do avoid touching or any physical contact cause they don't want you to know they like you and are afraid that what if you don't. And in your case, he might be avoiding because he didn't want to give you the vibe of him wanting to have sex
That would've been my reaction if I was interested. He might've been embarrassed about touching you because he is attracted to you, so he was afraid you didn't want to be touched by him. However, he might also not want to lead you on, so it's hard to say. Heard of the hoverhand phenomenon? When taking photos with an attractive girl, some guys won't touch a girls waist or shoulder. Guys who are shy, inexperienced, or insecure don't want to invade a woman's personal space when they feel like they don't deserve to get close. I admit I'm very insecure and did the hoverhand when I was younger, but I've also observed women squirm while trying to get away from touchy/creepy guys, and I have desire to put a girl through that. (Once I'm in a relationship though, I'm very cuddly) Eventually, a guy might figure out what amount of touching is harmless and can still convey interest, but it takes a lot of confidence.
I usually try to avoid it unless I know the girls is open to it and even then I try not to over do it. For me its because I Dont know if she is also interested so I'm trying to avoid crossing personal boundaries and creeping her out. I Dont want to scare her off or alienate her.
Not to the degree that I recoil if we do touch but I avoid being a douchebag who'll find any excuse to touch her and be all over her, the type of girl I'm into doesn't dig that until we're getting together.