I've been talking to a guy getting to know him and I kind of want to know why him and his ex broke up and if he still talks to her and hangs out with her. I also kinda want to know if he still loves her. He said that the break up wasn't too bad but it wasn't fun and that his relationships never really worked out and all so that's why he's just been single and focused on himself. People say that the past doesn't matter but I'm just curious about it all. Is this something I should ask him about or should I not bring it up at all?
I generally feel like the past should be off limits and forgotten about unless there is a reason to bring it up , maybe a funny story about how horrible an ex was or something but really who wants to hear about the ex? think if people had a dating " resume " like they have a resume for work , how disgusted we'd be to see who they had been with before and how long they had spent dating them , it be horrible to look at and see , this isn't stuff we need to know
The past absolutely does matter. It gives you some insight into what kind of person he is and you need to know whether this past relationship still haunts him. Ask him if he feels comfortable talking about it.
No, not at all. But you should wait until you have established a good & trusting relationship w/new dude? Not as easy as it sounds. If he is a jealous type, It'll cause huge, probably insurmountable problems, and destroy the relationship. And if he's at all violent, it could be dangerous for you.
And he shouldn't hang or text or talk with her, that's a huge red flag. He should be able to get over it and move on - done with her.
Watch this dude and keep him at arms length, no pics, secrets SEX (BJ's included) etc.
Doesn't sound like he's ready to commit to you. Too immature and not man enough to listen, confide\share, console, advise, encourage , fuck 'em. That's not what you want in your man.
Honestly, I don't think you should pry. If they want to tell you, they'll tell you. Asking why and if he still loves her might well freak him out and make him think you doubt his sincerity or commitment to you (which is kinda true)
if it was me i would not ask just bc if im dating her or anything like that i dont want to mess up just bc i asked about there last relationship if you know what i mean but if she takes about it then it be different
If the conversation goes there again you can try (don't push it), but I would wait until you know each other better. When you guys aren't just talking, but have gone out and been a thing for a little while. I don't really ask about sexual partner counts, but I think past relationship experiences can be good to delve into a bit. Just to understand where he's coming from.
I don't think you should ask someone about their past relationship. It would just come off as nosy and rude. Maybe he doesn't want to be reminded. But if he does bring up his past relationship, I guess it would be okay to ask more questions about it.
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