I'm really nervous and confused: I'm competing against three guys for the same girl (PLEASE READ ALL ADDITIONAL INFO). What do I do in this situation?

Okay, so let me give you a bit of a backstory: Abour two weeks ago, I met this amazing girl. We'd actually been following each other for a few months on Instagram, but we'd never met in person. Prior to our meeting, she'd been told by one of our mutual friends that we'd be good for each other, so there was bit of an interest from the start. Two weeks ago, we happened to be at the same event. In hopes of potentially getting us together, our friends arranged for her and me to meet one another. Honestly, I think it went well, but - like a complete fool - I forgot to ask her for her number. However, she asked our mutual friend to give me hers in hopes that I would text her; I did. It's seemed to go really well, and we've even talked about that interest she's showed, but we haven't really expounded upon it. Now, here's for the issue: she has a past with a guy that she's been friends with for years. Though he's head-over-heels for her, she's told him that nothing could happen between them. In addition to that, one of my best friends now has an interest in her; I don't think he's really talked to her much though. On paper, I feel like I should be happy (considering that she actually expressed interest in me; that we've been talking; and that we've even talked about her wanting to meet me), but I'm a little nervous. Without sounding like a pretentious douche, I'll say that I think I'm a nice, attractive, smart guy, but I'm just a little afraid that I'll screw things up. I honestly really like this girl, but I just don't know how to carry things out. I'm only seventeen, so it probably wouldn't be the end of the world if things didn't work out, but this is the first girl I've actually felt like I'd want to pursue a legitimate relationship with. Texting has been going well, but I just don't want to bore her or let the conversation become monotonous.

  • Be assertive and try to streamline the process, since I have a lot of competition
    50% (2)17% (1)30% (3)Vote
  • Be happy with knowing that she's expressed interest/let things just happen/nothing
    50% (2)33% (2)40% (4)Vote
  • Give up on the situation, since I could reasonably find another girl (though that's not the thing I want to do, at the moment)
    0% (0)33% (2)20% (2)Vote
  • Forget about it; I'm probably overthinking it and being paranoid
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And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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What Girls Said 1

  • Don't overthink it. You can't force a relationship to blossom, it blossoms in it's own time. The best thing you can do is be yourself and relax.

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    • 3mo

      Thanks for the advice. I guess the conservative approach is probably the safest. I really do think I like her, and I can't wait to see where things go with her, but I don't want to screw up my relationship with one of the best friends (the one who also happens to like her). It seems like I'm actually the one she likes, so I guess I shouldn't worry too much. Since you're a girl, do you have any advice as to how I could keep text if interesting? I'm worried about potentially boring her, thus losing my handle on the situation.

    • 3mo

      Talk about things you're interested in and ask her about stuff she's interested in. Talk about events going on around you like what's happening in the world. There's always something to talk about. As for your friend, if stuff goes down, that's life. Just don't do him dirty purposefully. People will come in and out of your life and it's part of the experience. I wish you the best of luck.

    • 3mo

      Thanks for the advice. I'm really hoping all goes well!

What Guys Said 2

  • less texts and more face to face.

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    • 3mo

      That seems like a smart way to handle it, @finalphilosophy. A friend of mine also said that I should tone down the texting; potentially giving her more of a want to talk. I think I'm hanging out with her in a couple of weeks, so that'll be good. The answer is probably to just wait and feel things out, but should I talk about her and I me, when we hang out? I mean, the mutual interest is kind of a thing that's even been discussed; I feel like it'd kind of be the "elephant in the room."

    • 3mo

      Just hang out and make her happy.

  • Give up on the situation, since I could reasonably find another girl (though that's not the thing I want to do, at the moment)

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