Why do men just stop communicating instead of just telling you they are not interested or whatever the reason really is?

I recently reconnected with an old high school friend. We have been talking for a few months now. Talking, texting, flirting, getting to know each other again. I went to visit for a week and we spent a lot of time together and were intimate. He took me out introduced me to his friends etc. I came home and he talked of us and a future and what that might look like and said we would work this out. A couple of weeks go by... His texts become not as regular. I know he has been stressed out so I don't bug him, I figure when he feels better he will go back to normal. The communication did not pick back up. He responds if I initiate communication which is like every other day or two, not like I am blowing up the phone and this change has only been within the last week, but doesn't initiate any longer. I noticed his FB activity has changed also ( as childish as that feels to type). It is a way of sharing, joking, communicating and I feel relevant in evaluating his behavior patterns. I don't fancy us in a relationship and he owes me nothing other than respect I think. If he has decided that he isn't interested why not say so? Why just disappear that way. It would be nicer for him to just be blunt and honest about whatever he is doing or feels. What goes through the male brain that thinks it is better to just disappear rather than tell her what the deal is?


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What Guys Said 2

  • Women can't handle rejection. Men have to face it every day, our entire lives, so we get used to it. But few women ever really get used to it like men do. So most women, if they get rejected, they go thermonuclear. There's no reason to take that, especially from a bitch you're not even fucking, so why would any man want to? If you don't know how to make a woman go away and think it was her idea, then pulling a fade is the next best thing.

    You know how women are always saying they don't owe men anything? Well that goes both ways. We on YOU nothing, also. Not dates, not attention, not marriage, not even respect or courtesy. You want something, earn it. Obviously he doesn't think you've earned it.

    I'm curious about something... you say he was a high school friend. Was he maybe one of those beta orbiters that you Friendzoned back in the day? Maybe now that he's fucked you, he's gotten what he wanted years ago and realized that you were a big letdown, so he's pulling a fade. It's possible. Without knowing how you two were in the past, I can't say one way or another for sure, but it's definitely in the realm of possibility.

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    • 3mo

      Thanks for the response. We hooked up back then so he certainly wasn't friend zoned. As he was discussing our future plans since we are distant I would think our friendship past and present would have earned respect. We weren't strangers who didn't know each other.

    • 3mo

      Oh, well that certainly eliminates that, then.

  • Same reason why girls do it.

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    • 3mo

      I don't thank you which is why I asked.

What Girls Said 1

  • Women do that too, it's not just men. They are too cowards to openly tell you that they are not interested, so their brain decides that the best choice they have is to ghost on you.

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