Guys, I think he's showing signs that he's serious about dating me. Am I right? Why aren't I his girlfriend then?

This guy and I knew eachother first from meeting in real life and then had a relationship online for about a year. We finally started dating in real life recently and have taken it pretty slow, but it's been a bit over a month and he now invited me to leave clothes in his dresser drawer and leave my toiletries in his bathroom (shampoo, toothbrush, cleanser, etc). I have met all of his friends and he includes me in his weekly hangout with them. However, he has not asked me to be his girlfriend officially, though his friends make comments like "you've gotta keep her around" and he makes plans with me for months in advance from now. Why do you think he hasn't asked me to be his gf?


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What Guys Said 3

  • Are you asking him to actually use the words "be my girlfriend"? Because that probably won't happen. But the fact that he's planning things months in advance and making space for you to leave things at his place - look you ARE his girlfriend! Just because he doesn't set aside a five second moment to ask you doesn't mean you aren't. What do you think you are to him?

    • I know that everything FEELS like I am, and I know I am not just someone he's seeing for physical intimacy/sex, seeing as we haven't really done much... but I feel like if I ever said I was his girlfriend, it would come as news to him, considering that he hasn't asked. Wouldn't I seem like a "pyscho" if I go ahead and make the call on my own?

  • Maybe he just already thinks of you as one and sees no need to state it?
    Or if you're so worried about it, why don't you ask him to make it official?

    • I feel like if I have to ask, it's because he doesn't want it. If he likes me enough, wouldn't he want to be sure we were a couple?

    • But what if he feels that if he has to ask it's because you don't want it?

  • Since being official boyfriend/girlfriend and being exclusive are usually more important to the girl than the guy, a lot of guys just wait for the girl to bring it up

    • I feel like this is because it is the ideal situation for a guy to have what is basically a girlfriend without the obligation of ACTUALLY having one. :/