Girl I'm seeing just told me she recently got out of a 5 yr relationship, how should I proceed?

2 weeks ago I had a date with this girl who I ended up liking a lot as we have so much in common and she's very physically attractive.

We we haven't seen each other since due to our busy schedules but we're still in contact.

Having said that, she just revealed to me that she just got out of a 5 year relationship. She said it ended 2 months ago but he moved out of her apartment 4 weeks ago.

Now she hasn't complained about him, said she misses him, or acted bitter and negative about it. She just said she recently broke up and hasn't given any other details.

Im alert but until any of the things happen I just mentioned happen, I don't see any reason to get too skeptical.

Since I do like this person, how should I proceed? Should I move at a turtle's pace? I like her a lot but I also do not wanna appear too readily available or overly into her.

Having been rebounded by a girl a few years ago was cute and had a lot in common, I can say it fucked me up mentally for quite a bit.


What Girls Said 1

  • Omg for a sec I thought you are my guy lol
    I just got out of 5 years relationship too well it's been 6 months so your girl is much much recent.
    It really depends on how they broke up.
    Mine cheated on me. And though I loved him very very much, I just knew he's not the right one and I would never be happy being with him.. Like I knew I deserve better.
    So even though it's been 5 years, I have no feelings left for him. Of course I think about him here and there that doesn't mean I miss him or want him back.
    Ask her how her relationship ended. I don't think there's nothing wrong with asking and talking about it.

    My advice would be, just be yourself. And be sweet and nice and caring to her. It must been tough for her so just be there for her and show her how great guy you are that she deserves someone like you not her ex.

    Talk to her and don't be stressed out.

    • 2mo

      Yeah I was kinda froze up when she texted me about it, I was kinda changing the topic because I don't like to talk about exes, at least not that early on.

      I just found myself a little cautious because I had never felt that close to someone on the first date.

    • 2mo

      Like we made out to some of my favorite bands, which she put on, cuddled to horror movies, and conversed so well. It was unrealistic.

      Not putting her on a pedestal but she's someone I could definitely see myself dating long term if that makes any sense.

    • 2mo

      How long have you been seeing the guy you're seeing now?

What Guys Said 2

  • Everyone is different so you can't assume she is only looking to have fun or cleanse her old boyfriend. She may be the type to not like being single and is legitimately interested in you for something serious. Anyway, I would still take it as she gives it and not expect much. I would also be extra patient with her if she talks too much about her ex or is not open to new things for a while.

    • 2mo

      Yeah coincidentally, right after I made posted this question, she sent me a text and a snap chat. She asked me about the concert I went to last night that she wanted to go to but couldn't.

      I hate playing mind games but due to the circumstance with the recent break up and what not, I'm gonna wait to reply a few hours, mainly because I'm busy at work and I like her but don't want her to think I'm too available.

    • 2mo

      She hasn't talked about her ex really. She just said that she got out of a long term relationship and that's literally it.

      Not trying to project what the previous girl who rebounded did to me onto this girl, just more aware of the signs of that makes any sense.

    • 2mo

      If that makes any sense*

  • Just take it slow and see how it goes, she might not necessarily want to jump into a new relationship that fast. Honestly it's best to try to treat it like you were dating any other girl.

    • 2mo

      Yeah even though I stayed at her place on the first date and we cuddled, made out, and held hands while walking her dog... she still hasn't acted relationship like which is good.

      The one time I did get rebounded, the girl was moving fast which caused me to move fast. Things ended as quickly as they started which fucked me up.

    • 2mo

      Have you dated anyone on the rebound or freshly single?