Am I wishing for the impossible?

Have been friends with this guy for years, talking regularly on social media etc.
Long story short, a situation threw us together and we totally hit it off. Few weeks later we slept together. It was awkward and awful but there was a definite spark there.
We met several times after, mainly for coffee and a chat and would laugh endlessly.
Cut to now. We've been sleeping together for the last few months and meeting a few times a week. We talk every day, plus exchanging at least 50 texts.
It was supposed to be uncomplicated fun but hasn't turned out like that.

Whats the problem? He has a girlfriend.

They don't get on anymore and haven't for a while, both parties being totally miserable.
I know this from what he says and I have mutual friends with his girlfriend who say the same about her.
They don't live together and see each other 3 or 4 times a week. There is no sex in their relationship yet they are still together. His friends have said recently that he's told them he doesn't want to be with her anymore.
Am I stupid in waiting for their relationship to end? I don't think he's using me for sex as he's happy for us to just sit and chat/laugh/watch tv etc.
i can't get my head around why he's not ended their relationship though.
I've told him how I feel and he cried, thinking he had hurt me and said he shouldn't have got involved with me before he ended his relationship. He was full of apologies but in all honesty, im
not hurt. I'm just confused.

We aren't young either. We are both in our mid 30's

Is he likely to leave the relationship or am I just wishing for something I can't have?


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What Guys Said 1

  • "It was awkward and awful but there was a definite spark there." How does that work?

    Anyhow, if he has balls enough, and isn't lying to you, he'll leave the relationship. Otherwise, he probably won't.

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    • 3mo

      Ha, it meant that it wasn't just about sex.
      Would a man just leave suddenly though or would he be waiting for the right moment, therefore dragging it out a bit?

    • 3mo

      He'd wait for the right time, again, assuming he was going to. The problem is neither you nor he have any idea when that "right time" will be. Could be a month, could be a year, could be longer. Have you never heard of people who staff in miserable relationships for years?

What Girls Said 1

  • He's probably going to end the relationship if I'm honest, if there's no sex and if neither of them are happy one of them is bound to end the relationship at one point, if your happy with This man and you love spending time with him then wait for as long as you have too, but if them two suddenly decide to work on their relationship and all of a sudden they are working again then that's your que to leave

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    • 3mo

      Thanks for your reply and not judging me either.
      I don't want to give up on him, because I genuinely believe their relationship isn't going to work out but in the same breath, I can't think clearly anymore ha.
      I don't think I've ever met anyone who has made me laugh as much and made me feel comfortable just being me.

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